Have you ever stopped to think that living for Christ can, in some ways, be compared to life as a spy?
No, not 007, with pen grenades and cars that shoot missiles from the headlights. James Bond movies can be fun to watch, but they’re not the most accurate depictions of what life as a real spy is like.
I’m sure there’s a lot of spying that happens today, but to me a lot of the interesting stuff happened during the Cold War. It just seemed like it was more interesting before you could hack everything through the internet. In some cases, there might be someone with access to very valuable information that feeds juicy tidbits back to their handler. You’d also have dramatic stories of Soviet pilots defecting with the latest fighter plane design.
In just about every case, you’ve got a human being that’s committing some level of treason against their country, and at least part of their mind is dwelling on the consequences they’ll face if they get caught. Some people are simply more given to worry, but excessive worry and the lifestyle of a spy are not compatible things. I can’t say that I’ve walked in their shoes or experienced the stress that they experience, but for many spies (or “assets”), there comes a point at which their life of ulcers and poor sleep gets to be too much, and they ask to be extracted or set free from the lifestyle they’re living.
That can be us as Christians. We’re simply passing through this world. “This rental’s not our home.” Working for God in the pursuit of bringing Him glory, we long for Heaven but we don’t know when we’ll get there.
Spies don’t work alone; the information or function they provide serves someone. That someone can be called many things: a spymaster, a handler, an asset manager (you might pause the next time you meet someone that describes themselves as an “asset manager”). That person’s role is to direct the spy what to do or what to report on.
When someone conducting espionage gets frayed nerves and tells their handler they’ve had enough and want to be “brought in from the cold,” the handler needs to weigh a few things. Can that asset be convinced to stay in place a little longer? How much longer will that asset be useful? Is it worth the risk of leaving them in place and being caught? Are they still motivated by the same factor that drove them to engage in espionage in the first place? The handler may need to pull out all the stops to convince the spy to stay in place and keep doing what they’re doing, and that may entail using stick, carrot, or both. After all, even if the handler is genuinely fond of their asset, the information will stop flowing if the asset leaves their post.
Ultimately, that spy lives their life in a way that reprioritizes someone else’s desires over their own. I think this is what Paul meant in Romans 12 when he wrote of our lives being a “living sacrifice.”
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:1-2
Unlike an Old Testament sacrifice, where an animal’s life is taken in our place, we’re to present our lives and bodies as a “living sacrifice.” It’s a higher, more productive calling than a calling with a quick ending. It’s a life of service that spans years and in many cases multiple decades; compared with an ending on an altar, this kind of sacrifice can be much more taxing and take much more effort.
At one point or another, just about everybody has wished for the trials and difficult times in their lives to be over. Sometimes people even go so far as to pray for God to take them home before it gets any worse. While that would certainly take away the stress and shortcomings of what we have to endure in this imperfect world, it would severely restrict the amount of usefulness God can wring out of us in this life. In that regard, He’ll sometimes say “No, I need you where you are right now. Sit tight, keep doing what you’re doing, and I promise I’ll make it up to you later.” Like an actual spymaster, He may do this through reassurance, or He may do it by applying more leverage on you.
So here we are. We’re not home yet, but while we’re waiting for God to take us there (in His time, not ours), we’re to place God’s will above our own.
This next part is hard to hear; I wish I could look you in the eye and reach out and put my hand on your shoulder when I say this. The world will always hate Christ, and by extension it will always hate those that follow Him. If you’re a passionate and obedient Christ-follower, you will have your life of peace, prosperity, and fulfillment, but it’s probably not going to be here on Earth. So saddle up, grit your teeth, and dig in, being willing to endure difficulties and discomfort, because the part you’re waiting for won’t be until you’re finished here. It’s going to be worth it, though, so hang tough and let your Handler be the one to tell you what your role is and when it’s time to come in from the cold.
Next week’s post will have more on what it is that God wants you, specifically, to do in this life. Spoiler alert: I don’t know what your specific calling is, but I’ll talk about how to help you figure it out. If this is something that’s been on your mind, please spend the next week in prayer to help prepare you for it.