Category: Growing in Trust and Capability

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I Never Even Tried Before. Why not?

Boy, I don’t even think my parents know about this one. When I was in 11th or 12th grade, I did something very uncharacteristic of me. I decided to try out for the school play.

Now you have to understand, this was a very unusual thing for me to pursue. There must have been a cute girl in the cast or something. I can’t think of who it would have been, though. Honestly, I think I just wanted to try something totally new.

I can’t even remember what the production was, but I remember I decided to read for the part of a major supporting character. It wasn’t a lead role or anything, but it was somebody who’d grab a lot of attention when on stage. Think ‘Franc’ from “Father of the Bride” or a detective in some other play.

I’d never done a school play before (aside from stuff in elementary school). I went to the interest meeting, got a copy of the play, and grabbed a packet to fill out. In that packet I wrote down the part I wanted to play. One of the questions they asked was something like “if you don’t get your preferred role, are you willing to accept a different part?” I thought it over for a bit, then answered “no.” At some point I turned in the packet, and eventually received information for auditions.

The faculty member in charge of the play was an English teacher I’d had sometime in high school. She knew me from class, but I’d never worked with her in an acting capacity. Whatever the role was, I gave it a shot during the audition. I thought I did fine, but didn’t know the teacher’s thoughts on it. Ultimately, I didn’t get the part, and I don’t know who did. Since the “try something new” thing didn’t pan out this time, I didn’t even go see the play.

With the benefit of hindsight, I totally get why I didn’t get the part. Even if I had a really good audition, I had no track record for the director or other students to rely on. The director can’t take an unknown and throw him out on stage in a prominent role. Will he freeze? Will he nail it? There’s just no way of knowing. Besides, if we’ve got Joey over here, trying out for the same role, and the director’s worked with Joey before, she knows a little better what she can expect from him. Unless the director’s short on cast members, there’s really no upside to picking the brand new guy who’s only willing to play one particular role rather than someone who’s been in plays before and is willing to consider multiple roles if it helps the team out.

Christianity can be a little like this. When it comes to leaps of faith and following God’s lead in your life, track records of past experience are important. The twist here, though, is that past performance doesn’t help God trust you any more, it helps you trust God more as He provides for you in subsequently bigger and bigger ways. With the benefit of hindsight, you can see how your previous struggles and challenges helped prepare you for subsequent larger struggles and challenges. Again, this doesn’t build the Lord’s trust in you, but you get to look at your history of being faithful and seeing God at work in and through you. Seeing that, you trust Him more.

I’d also urge you to be willing to play something other than your preferred role. We can get comfortable in the ways we serve God, and become less and less willing to step out of our comfort zones as time goes on. The Lord loves a willing heart. I’ve heard it said that as Christians, we’re always in the furnace or on the anvil. God spends a lot of time honing us and shaping us into who He wants us to be. I believe a willingness to follow His call into waters deeper than we’re comfortable with is a great way to demonstrate our obedience both to Him and to ourselves.

If you have no track record of faithfulness to the Lord, why not start today? Start small. Begin reading from the Bible every day. Start tithing. Stop doing things you know you shouldn’t be doing. Get rid of stuff you know you shouldn’t have. Being faithful in the small things helps build that history, that lifestyle of obedience. As you follow through on those small things, God will give you bigger opportunities to make a difference in someone else’s life, or lots of other peoples’ lives.

But it all starts with small steps of faithfulness. Start building that track record today.

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When Pushing too Hard can Push Others Away

I like to take different types of personality tests. It’s fascinating to answer a bunch of questions, then get results accurately describing the way I approach life. I’m one thing on the Meyers-Briggs, I’m something else on the Enneagram, and I’m a variety of other things on other tests. It’s always humbling to receive such accurate descriptions of myself from complete strangers, and then realize no matter how detailed those descriptions get, my creator knows me at an even deeper level. He knows not only my strengths and weaknesses and how I deal with conflict, but the failures and victories still ahead of me, how I’ll respond to challenges He knows are coming, and to what degree I’ll rely on Him through it all.

One of the tests I’ve recently taken focuses on the way I communicate with others. I’m what’s known as a “Challenger.” A Challenger transmits courage and awakens calling. That means when I see people, I see greatness inside of them, and I want to both convince them and motivate them to unlock it. If you’ve poked around on the DareGreatlyNow website, in the “about us” section or in past posts, this may not be a surprise.

It saddens me to see people with untapped potential. I want to help people, especially Christians, believe they can achieve the improbable things God’s called them to do with their lives. I want Christ-followers to see they don’t need to sweat all the details, or even have a clear view of the big picture; they just need to do their part, whatever it is, and trust not only that God knows what He’s doing, but also that He’s weaving all the lives and efforts of other believers into a masterpiece to fight evil, save souls, strengthen faith, and glorify Him.

A pitfall for me is being susceptible to always pushing for more, always urging higher and higher levels of dedication or performance, at the cost of failing to stop and celebrate wins. “That was yesterday’s victory, we need new sacrifice to win today’s battle!” I’m in danger of pushing the people I communicate with away, making them think “will I ever be enough for this guy?”

So let’s meet in the middle. Right now I’m talking to my Christian brothers and sisters out there. How has God been at work in your life lately, and what wins in your spiritual life can you celebrate? If you’re trying to establish or improve devotional habits, for example, celebrate a win like “I read the entire passage I was supposed to read for my devotions,” or “I’m still extending my longest streak of daily devotions.” Those are wins, and they should be celebrated.

If you’re trying to get established in a habit or spiritual discipline, let me offer a tactic you might find useful. I’ll use the example of going to the gym, but you can use it for building time spent on devotions, prayer, volunteering, giving to the offering, and any other habit you’re trying to improve. If it’s been a long time since you’ve been to the gym and you’re pretty much starting from scratch, follow this simple rule. For the first week, go every day you’ve decided to go (three days a week, five days a week, etc.), but spend no longer than 5 minutes inside the building. You can walk in, get on a treadmill for 3 minutes, then walk out. Finish week one? Do the same thing for week two. Do it again in week three. What this is doing is helping you master the art of showing up. You’ll get tired of spending more time traveling to and from the gym than actually working out. Once you prove to yourself you can make room in your life for the habit, show yourself you can improve on it. Instead of 3 minutes on the treadmill, do 7, or instead of 3 mph, do 3 and a half. Turn a set of curls into a set of curls and a set of flies. Instead of two laps in the pool, do four. Celebrate those wins as you reach new milestones. While you’re reaching those new milestones, you just might realize you have it within yourself to reach for even higher goals.

In a complete left turn, here’s another way of looking at this. Sometimes artwork speaks to me in a way nothing else does. I came across this picture while looking for music to listen to while writing. More than any other picture of friends embracing, wildlife beside peaceful waters, or a single set of footprints on the beach, this picture challenges me to move toward what I want to be spiritually. We see a soldier, having fulfilled the task he’s been assigned, taking a moment in his exhaustion before rising to his feet. It’s been a long fight, and his strength is practically gone. He’s been fighting so hard for so long he’s got to mentally push himself to even summon the strength to stand. He’s come under fire, he’s probably lost companions, but the equipping he’s received enabled him to perform the feat to which he’s been called. He can’t see the bigger picture, but he doesn’t need to, because he trusts his commander to use him the best way possible. Yes, he’s been intimidated, overwhelmed with fear, and knows there’s no guarantee he’ll see tomorrow, but he knows those are only excuses for not putting forth everything he’s got. By focusing on the things he can control and not worrying about the things he can’t, he can channel all his energy into what he’s been charged with doing.

Though it’s not part of the picture, I imagine a scene taking place later, when this same soldier kneels before his ruler, having brought honor to him through his obedience, faithfulness, and tenacity. Receiving a hand on his shoulder and a joyful “well done” from the figure he wants most in his life to honor would bring him to tears.

It’s a metaphor of the way I want my life to look when it reaches its end, and it’s what I want to urge you toward in your own life. What strength are you holding back and not committing to your calling? Is there a tough choice you’ve been avoiding, because you know it will cost you something you’ve so far been unwilling to give? Celebrate the wins in your spiritual life, but don’t ever think “this is it. This is as high as I can go. God can’t use me any more than He already has.” The path to your greatest potential might just lie through your greatest fear.

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Is There Really Any Purpose To Being Made To Wait?

Lately there’s been a beautiful stretch of weather where I live, but it’s not always this nice in August. The current low-humidity 70s and 80s are very nice, but once upon a time I worked in the field of residential construction, and I’ve had to deal with some nasty weather conditions.

I don’t even remember this dude’s real name, but everybody called him “Lumpy.” (The origin of the name, I think, had to do with some poorly mixed spackle or grout.) One hot August day Lumpy and I were working in Jersey somewhere, and it was time to call it a day. We jumped in the company truck and got on Interstate 80 to drive back to Pennsylvania. Everything went fine for awhile, but we ended up running into a wall of red brake lights on the highway.

I stopped the truck and we just sat for a bit, waiting for the jam to start breaking loose. Only it didn’t. We just sat there, waiting. The truck idled so long the fuel gauge began dipping. Brake lights turned off as people put their cars in park and killed their engines. Eventually people got out of their vehicles and walked around.

Not knowing how long we’d be there, we shut off our engine, too. The cold air from the A/C stopped blowing, and rather than bake in a hot vehicle, we opened the windows and got hit with hot, humid air. As we sat there sweating, we saw people get out of their cars and go sit in the shade of the trees, either talking on their flip phones or Blackberries, lighting (or bumming) cigarettes, or wandering into the treeline to find an impromptu restroom. People rolled down their windows and began talking with complete strangers. Lumpy wasn’t the most talkative guy, so we just sat there, listening to the radio and waiting for something to happen. What else could we do? We were powerless to get ourselves out of the situation.

I don’t know how people sensed movement, but at some point they started getting back in their cars. The brake lights turned on again as they cranked engines and put cars into gear. I can’t think of many times I was more relieved to see a traffic jam start to move again. I was psyched to hit 30 mph. I have no idea what snarled traffic so badly, but we made it back without further incident.

Sometimes you find yourself in a period of waiting, where all you can do is watch beyond-your-control circumstances play out. They are agonizing at times, often emotionally draining. This example is much more lighthearted than what a lot of other people have to deal with, but it illustrates the concept that sometimes God just wants you to wait. Maybe it’s to teach you to rest in Him, maybe it’s to force you to deal with something you’ve been avoiding. It could be a time where something’s being prepared for later. I know it’s hard. Sometimes it’s really hard. This is one time I can’t provide much insight, as God’s purpose in making you wait could be tied to any number of reasons. Spend time in the Word and in prayer, listen with everything you’ve got to what the Lord may be saying to you, and look for ways to make the most of this unusual season. I don’t know when it will be over, but seasons don’t last forever.

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Warning: Audacity in Progress

In the past I’ve shared about how God laid on my heart the task of writing a series of fictional Christian books.

To give you some context about how audacious that is for me, consider this. Far and away, the largest writing endeavor I’ve ever undertaken is this blog. None of its entries are very long. This entry is a little over 1,000 words. The longest document I’ve ever written was for a college course, with a requirement of 10,000 words, I think. What makes me believe, despite having no writing classes other than basic English courses in college, I can write a series of 10 books, each with 50,000-80,000 words, totaling over 600,000? With “Piece of Cake” at one end of the spectrum and “Impossible” at the other end, I’m a lot closer to “Impossible” than “Cake.”

It’s very important to remember: those God calls, He equips.

Well that’s a wonderful little platitude, but how are things going, really? The idea for this project first took root during COVID lockdowns. It’s been four years. Where are we on this?

To be honest with you, it’s tough. I’ve never written a book before, let alone ten of them. I laid out a plan for what the different books would cover, then started at the beginning with the first book in the series. When I got bored with that story I’d jump to a different one, then another. What I found was this method diluted my efforts too much; I made headway, but it didn’t feel like it was getting traction. With my hectic schedule, I don’t have big chunks of time to work on stuff like this, so I only get maybe an hour and a half or two hours to work on it, sometimes once a week. Although I’m trying to surpass a half million words, this method’s not going to allow me to make big leaps forward.

I started focusing my efforts on a group of three specific books, rather than dabbling in ten books. Over time I started adding 1,000 words, 1,250, sometimes even 1,500 words at a shot. I’d mess around with the table of contents, re-sequence parts of the story to make it flow better and make more sense. A new idea would hit at inopportune times, and I’d write it down on my hand or email myself from work. The goal is still to get over 600,000 words, and I still have hundreds of thousands of words to write, but you know what I’ve learned so far?

This insurmountable goal is looking more achievable.

The progress isn’t as fast as I’d like, since I do have other responsibilities (a family, a full time job, a blog, my daily/weekly routines, a house, yard, and vehicles to take care of, etc.). In fact, the majority of my writing happens during my kids’ extracurricular activities. I drive them somewhere, and rather than come home after dropping them off, I stay there and write until it’s time to pick them up. Considering the sporadic chunks of time I have to work on this project, I’m pleased I haven’t given up on it. Persistence in small bites translates into small chunks of progress, but those chunks have begun banding together to result in some solid headway on that group of three books. With a combined target of 200,000 words for the three, I’ve written almost 125,000 words. That’s over 60% of the goal.

I’ve written another 50,000 words across the other seven books in the series. That totals almost 175,000 words. There’s still tons of work to be done, don’t get me wrong, but 175,000 out of a projected goal of 630,000 words is pretty encouraging. Don’t look now, but by remaining determined to follow through, I’ve gone more than a quarter of the way toward this unreachable goal.

Yes, of course, there will be an obscene amount of work to be done besides the writing. Finding plot holes, missing chunks of story, editing for clarity or typos, finding a professional editor and going through all the associated back-and-forth, finding an illustrator, a publisher, maybe being involved in marketing, these are all things demanding lots of attention. At the early stages of this effort, though, everything hinges on having a story to work with. The other steps can’t happen until the stories come together on paper. For someone whose longest writing was 10,000 prior to this, 175,000 is downright phenomenal.

I share this with you not because I want to wow you or try to make you think I’m cool for trying something new, but to show you, as I’m walking through this right now, that when God challenges you with a massive undertaking or insurmountable goal, the sooner you get started, the sooner your efforts will add up to something He can use. The Lord’s commissioning of this project assures its eventual success, provided I actually follow through and complete it. If I don’t, He’ll achieve His aims some other way, but this is the invitation God extended to me, offering to let me play a part in His grander story. Whatever success comes of it should be credited to the Lord, not me.

I don’t know what God’s going to do with these books once they’re done, but I have to maintain the attitude He’s going to use them either in revival or in causing unsaved readers to start asking important questions. Getting where God’s leading sometimes takes small, persistent actions over a long period of time. It’s sometimes frustratingly slow, and sometimes victory means you haven’t yet thrown in the towel, but the following Bible verse helps spur me on:

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

Is there something in your life God’s called you to do, and you need to be reminded not to give up? Hang in there. Don’t quit. If God called you to do it, it’s entirely possible someone down the road will either join or return to God’s Kingdom because of something you had a hand in.

Don’t give up. Someone’s counting on you.

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Aim Small, Miss Small

There are a couple of movies out there that cite the phrase “aim small, miss small.”

The movies I’ve seen this line quoted in use it in reference to shooting. If you aim generically at the broad side of a barn, the theory goes, you’ll probably be able to hit it, but if you just shot 10 times at a barn without aiming at any particular part of it, like you were firing from the hip, you’d probably have 10 hits that are widely scattered across the target.

Instead, pick a specific point on that barn, maybe a prominent notch on an individual board. Try this technique with another 10 shots, and you’re going to have a much tighter shot grouping. By aiming at something small (in relation to the target), if you miss, you probably won’t be far off, and you’ll obtain a much more consistent result.

Consider this saying in light of how you pray. Prayer should include praise and thanksgiving to the Lord, and this is very important. That portion of your prayers certainly warrants more than the passing mention that’s here in this post, but today I want to focus on the asking part of prayer. I would guess that for many of us, the most common reason behind why we pray is because we’re asking God for something.

God wants us to pray, yes. He wants us to pray often, having an attitude of prayer that lasts throughout the day. This frequent communication brings you nearer to God. But what is it that you ask for when you pray? Health? Blessings? Maybe salvation for unsaved friends or family? Revival is always something we should be asking for, and should be a frequent request.

I have to ask, though: just how specific do you get in your prayers? Do you ask generally for salvation for those nameless, faceless people you pass regularly, or do you ask consistently for God to move the heart of that cantankerous neighbor you avoid when you see them outside? Do you ask God to spark revival, or do you ask Him to show you the part He wants you to play in bringing that revival about?

Let’s assume for a moment that for the next year, God agreed to grant all your (unselfish) requests. How would that affect your prayer life? I’m guessing that not only would you spend a lot more time in prayer; you’d also get a lot more specific about the things you pray for. This probably isn’t going to be a scenario God chooses for you, but that’s no reason to skip out on that type of prayer life. Keep that in mind the next time you bring your requests to the Lord.

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Quick Hit: It’s Time To Unlock Your Potential

You are a mighty spiritual warrior in training.

Did you know that? A lot of people seem to think that Christians are supposed to be pushovers or doormats. That’s categorically false. We’re supposed to stand apart from the culture, and that’s something that often takes great courage and fortitude.

You probably don’t often feel like a mighty warrior, though. Of course there are giants of the faith, and you might wonder how you can even be mentioned in the same breath as some of them.

Listen to me. If you’re not yet at the end of your Christian walk, God can still do plenty in and through you. He wants you for who you are, not who you ought to be. Yet He looks at you and sees not who you are now, but what you can become.

The world is dark and getting darker. Let the light of Christ shine in your life, whatever that looks like in your circumstances. We need you. Other Christians need you. Unbelievers need you. You may have some thoughts right now about how you can do that in your own life. God equipped you with certain talents or interests, and He did that for a reason. Follow through, and let God use you.

There’s a song that was very popular a few years back. It was about a guy that saw some of the hurt and injustice of the world, and he cried out “God, why don’t you do something?”

God said “I did. I created you.”

It might be true that you’re not a giant of the faith…yet. But it doesn’t take a giant to start with doing some of the little things that need to get done.

Matthew West “Do Something” music video.

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I Fail To See…Anything at All…

My wife and I have been married for 16 years now, and it’s been good. Our personalities complement each other, we have lots of laughs, and of course, we’re still learning together, especially when it comes to parenting.

One thing that’s kind of funny about our relationship, though, is a scenario that my wife continually finds herself in, but often doesn’t anticipate. She, like many people, sometimes stands up too fast, stretches, and then gets lightheaded.

There have been numerous times in our marriage when I see it coming, but she doesn’t. In the past I’ve been brushing my teeth, puttering around in the kitchen, coming down the stairs, or doing something else, and I’ll hear her stand up and stretch. At that point I know I’ve got a few beats to get there in time to catch her when her vision tunnels or goes dark. Sometimes the stretch lasts long enough that the muscles steal all the blood from her head and she starts to slump mid-stretch.

She can handle it herself, of course. It’s not like she’s helpless and passes out if it happens when I’m not around. The point is that I see it coming and she doesn’t. Sometimes I know her better than she knows herself.

God’s like that too. He knows you better than you do. I think each of us probably believes we know what’s best for us, and sometimes we maybe even think we know better than God.

“God, why haven’t I won the lottery yet?” “Because if you did, it would destroy your life.”

Or maybe “God, I think you blew it. I should have gotten that job.” “I can see why you think that, but if you did, you’d be focusing your energy somewhere other than where I want you to focus it right now.”

You may have prayed “God, I’m still waiting for that spouse/child to come into my life.” “Yes I know, but I have you doing something more important at the moment.”

There are endless reasons why God doesn’t follow your timetable or path. I don’t know why He does some things in certain ways, but I know He knows us better than we know ourselves. As we go through our lives endlessly wondering why He chose to make us take detours or experience setbacks, it can be painful, but remember that in light of His intimate knowledge of us, there’s probably at least one purpose behind it, even if we don’t know what it is.

Lord, it’s not too bad to trust You with certain areas of my life, but it can be really hard to trust You with EVERY area of my life. I know You know me best; please help me to accept that Your ways are higher than my ways, that it’s intentional when you slow me down as I’m ready to run ahead, and that whatever happens today is part of the preparation for tomorrow. Thank you for blessing me the ways You have. In Your name, Amen.

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You’re On Your Way to What You’ll Be Later

During my time in the Air Force I spent some time trying out to be a survival instructor. Known as SERE Specialists (Survival, Evasion, Resistance, & Escape), these professionals focus on preparing high-risk-of-capture personnel in the event they become isolated and cut off from friendly forces in neutral or enemy-held territory.

This was in 2004, so the Air Force was pretty busy at the time with both Afghanistan and Iraq. Lots of people needed SERE training, and there weren’t enough SERE Specialists to go around. To help boost numbers, representatives from the SERE career field spent time recruiting people while they were still in Basic Training. This got a lot of people interested, but before we could really get started with SERE Specialist training, we had to pass a screening course, known as SERE Indoc (indoctrination).

There are some odd situations that occurred along the way as a result of how things unfolded. In Basic Training, they really regulated what (and how much) you ate. You’ve got a bunch of civilians from across the country and its territories that in most cases had a little extra pudge when they first showed up to Basic, and you give them healthy food, but you give them less of it than they’d like. Everybody loses weight, and some people lose a lot of it. (When I graduated Basic Training, I think my Mom was a little traumatized when she saw how skinny Uncle Sam made me.) Then, when you’re the skinniest you’ve been in awhile, they fit you for your dress uniforms.

After Basic, I went to SERE Indoc, which was very demanding physically. It usually involved five days a week of rigorous PT…lots of running, pushups, pull-ups, and rucking with heavy packs. I don’t remember how much, exactly, but between being able to eat normally again and putting on a lot of extra muscle over a couple of months, I probably gained over 30 pounds from my low point at Basic. The buttons on my dress shirt were definitely stressed, and there was no longer a crease in my dress pants above the knee because they were more like spandex or leggings at that point.

Mom & Dad came to see my graduation from Basic. They barely recognized me!
Some $5 footlongs & a few thousand pushups later

I can honestly say that I’m no longer as muscular or as heavy as I was back then, so that adds still more volatility to the weight yo-yo. It’s been awhile since I tried on my old dress uniform; maybe I should dig it out of mothballs to see how it fits.

I went into each of those phases with one set of characteristics, and due to the conditions I went through, it led to a new set of characteristics. It’s the same for the Christian. Not only are you imperfect when you’re born, you’re still imperfect when you’re born again. From the moment of salvation until the moment you slip from this life, God’s working on your heart and on your mind, shaping you into a tool He can wield to accomplish things in or through you that you’re not yet prepared to do.

He’s refining unwanted things out of your character or preparing you for a coming challenge. Some seasons of life will leave you gaunt and weak. Others will make you stronger. It’s all leading somewhere, though. Rarely does the path you’d chart out for your life align completely with the path God’s chosen for your life. Looking back, it becomes easier to see how a phase of life or a certain string of events prepared you for something that came afterwards. Right now you’re on your way to what you’ll be later. Seek God’s will for your life and see Him do something wonderful. Keep seeking God’s will for your life and watch how He entrusts you with more responsibility and higher callings.

Not sure what God’s will for your life is? Start by increasing the amount of time you spend in prayer. Confess the things you’ve done wrong, then tell Him all the things you’re thankful for. Do this on a recurring basis and see where it takes you.

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The Safest Time to Kayak Over Waterfalls is When the Water’s Big

I feel like I’ve had a lot of “20-years later” stories either lately or coming up. (Kayelling, 9/11, attending the 2002 Winter Olympics). Well, Senior year of college was a busy time for me, I guess. Today’s post talks about an event that happened 20 years ago this week.

There’s a creek near where I went to college that had a pair of roughly 6-foot waterfalls that were spaced about 50-100 yards apart. During most of the year, this is a very scenic spot with a water depth of only a few inches, but during the spring rains and snow melt, the creek swells, the current becomes much swifter, and for kayakers, the water gets too big to resist.

Gearing up for a double waterfall!

A 6-foot waterfall doesn’t sound like much. I’m a little over 6 feet tall, so it’s no big deal when I look eye-to-eye with another person the same height as me. It’s a different story when you’re sitting on the floor, looking up at someone that tall. That’s sort of what it’s like when sitting in a kayak and looking at a 6-foot-tall waterfall. I’d been over a four- or five-foot waterfall before and it went very well, but it wasn’t in water this big and it wasn’t in a “must-succeed” situation where a second set of falls lay waiting beyond.

There were three of us going that day. We all slid our boats into the water and allowed ourselves to get a good amount of space between us. Our most experienced paddler went first and demonstrated the line we should follow. As the least experienced kayaker, I went second, and the third guy brought up the rear. I followed the guide’s line, and I hit the first set of falls perfectly. I paddled right over the edge and had a great landing, and it was exhilarating!

On approach to the first waterfall
Quit while you’re ahead

I’m not exactly sure what happened next, but I think I hit some kind of undercurrent I wasn’t expecting, and I flipped over. I can tell you from experience that it’s a very unsettling feeling to be headed toward a waterfall while floating upside down in a capsized kayak.

Even though the creek was swollen to several times its usual size, the water was still only about 18 inches to two feet deep. As I was upside down, my helmet bounced along the bottom of the creek bed. I moved the paddle into position to right myself, but I had to modify the technique because the water was so shallow. I think I was trying to decide whether I should try the technique I’d practiced countless times in the pool, or let go of my paddle and use my hands to try pushing off the bottom to get flipped back up, hoping to catch the paddle again afterward. I didn’t want to risk going over the second set of falls without a paddle, and this wasn’t really the best time to try flipping back over using a method I’d never tried before, so I went the traditional route, but the water was too shallow to make it work the way I’d practiced. I don’t remember how many times if I tried it, but between not knowing how far away the upcoming falls were and confronting a compelling need to breathe, I decided to bail out.

Without question, it was really nice to be able to take a deep breath again, but I still had to contend with some challenges. After dragging my head along the bottom and fighting against the creek bed to try to position my paddle, I figured I wouldn’t have any problem just standing up wherever I was. I faced upstream and got on my knees. My wetsuit stopped above my knees, and I later realized that being pushed along while kneeling on a stone creek bed tears up your shins pretty badly. I got up on one knee, but my sandals couldn’t get any traction. I think I tried on the other knee too, but neither try worked. With my back to the looming falls, I did the only other thing I could think of: I swam as if my life depended on it in a foot and a half of water.

Thankfully, I did NOT take a trip over that second set of falls. I made it to the bank safely and jogged downstream to catch up with the first guy, who recovered my boat and paddle for me.

Ever have something just go in a TOTALLY different direction from what you expected? Don’t let it get you down. Living a life for Christ is going to have moments where you simply feel overwhelmed or inadequate. Then on top of that, experiencing failures only makes it feel worse. I’m certainly thankful there weren’t too many people there to witness this embarrassing situation. My two fellow paddlers were extremely gracious, and they reminded me that outings with the biggest mishaps make for the best stories.

If things had gone according to plan, it would have been an amazing 90 seconds to experience, but it wouldn’t be a very exciting story to pass along. Don’t be afraid to attempt big things in the name of building Christ’s kingdom, but when things don’t work out the way you expect (because God doesn’t follow YOUR plan), learn from the experience and use it to either make the next time different or to benefit someone that reminds you of your unfortunate or inexperienced younger self. You’re not the first one to make mistakes, but maybe you can pass along the wisdom you’ve learned through hard-won experience so others don’t have to make the same mistakes you’ve made.

Lord Jesus, when I look back at all the crazy situations I’ve willingly placed myself in, and how unscathed I came out of them when I should have met with much more serious consequences, it’s clear to me that there’s something after those experiences You wanted me around for, and it reminds me not to waste this life. Help me learn from the past, be bold in following after You, and share the things I’ve learned with others. Also, I don’t know how many guardian angels you’ve assigned to me, but please…thank them and bless them in a special way for me!

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When We’re Groggy but Settled

One of the things that are most fun about family get-togethers is seeing little kids. If you only see certain friends or family infrequently, you sometimes don’t realize how long it’s been until you see how big those kiddos got since the last time you saw them.

A little over a year ago we got together with some family that had a newborn. This year she was, well, a year older. The younger you are, the bigger difference a year makes.

There were a sizable number of people at this particular get-together. As the house started filling up with arriving family members, a mom with young kids disappeared into one of the back rooms. When she returned, she was carrying a toddler that had just woken up from a nap. This poor kiddo, who had been napping in a nice dark room, was brought out into a bright, loud room that had a bunch of people who weren’t here the last time around. She was still groggy, was still squinting, and had flushed cheeks. She looked confused, but she was with Mommy, so she didn’t seem upset or worried.

The following day was Sunday, and in church someone brought up the fact that once we trust Christ and are saved, we don’t just instantly disappear and show up in Heaven. He said something like “we’re left behind on Earth for awhile.” He went on to say that the reason for that is because we have work to do here on Earth; God calls each of us to live lives that honor Him and somehow contribute to His kingdom.

I’m not really sure what made me think of that little toddler, but for some reason she came to mind. Here we are, Christians…in the world but not of it. Our Heavenly Father has us in His arms, but we have no clue where He’s taking us while we’re here. We’re often disoriented, confused, and looking around at our surroundings without any understanding at all of what’s going on or what’s about to take place.

As we grow in our relationship with Christ, however, our trust in Him deepens. A newborn wails at the slightest hunger, but as they grow and learn to trust those caring for them, they learn that it’s not necessary to make such a fuss. It’s the same with us learning to trust our Savior. He’s going to do things we don’t understand, and will deny us things we desperately want, but as long as we can get past our self-centeredness, we can learn to trust Him. That trust deepens over time if we continue walking with Him. We’re going to be placed in situations where we’re uncomfortable or disoriented, but ultimately we know that we’ll be okay because we know Who’s holding us.

Honorable mention; saw this and had to include it

Here at the beginning of a new year, I hope you’ll take steps to walk closer with God, deepen your trust in Him (even when things are painful or uncertain), and be willing to let Him use you for His purposes.

Lord, as a new year begins, please help me to be open to whatever you have in store for me. We’ve had a couple rough years in a row now, and I don’t know what lies ahead, but help me to be confident in the hope that comes with living for You. Give me the strength and the resolve to follow wherever You lead me this year. In Your Holy name, Amen.