No Holding Back

The November after I graduated college, I took an adventure trip to Australia. One of the parts of the trip I was most excited about was the trip out to the Great Barrier Reef. I had never been scuba diving before, and the Great Barrier Reef was like, legendary from everything I’d heard. During this portion of the trip we all got on a boat that took us miles from shore, and we stayed out there for two overnights.

The crew operating the dive tour took us to several different locations known to be good diving spots. Once they securely anchored the boat at a given dive site, we waited for a designated time window before we could go in the water. Safety observers needed to be in position, and we needed to receive a dive brief where we learned about the features of the area, where to avoid, can’t-miss sites, and what depth limits we should not break. During this leg of my Australian trip, I had the opportunity to do about a dozen trips into the water, either snorkeling or scuba diving.

For those of us that were not scuba certified on this trip, we could pay a bit extra on some of the outings and a staff member would teach us enough to get by, and would be our dive buddy and personal guide during that particular dive. I wasn’t going to come all the way to Australia and NOT go scuba diving on the Great Barrier Reef. Since it wasn’t cheap though, I got a good mix of scuba dives and regular snorkeling.

The reef was an amazing thing to see, especially the amount and variety of life that lived there. The reef itself sounded like it was fizzing and popping. When snorkeling, I would hold my breath and dive down to get a closer look at some of the gorgeous sites. While snorkeling, there was so much to see, even if you only dove down a few feet. I started diving down more than a few feet, though. Equipped with flippers, I was able to swim deep a little easier than normal. The more you do it, the more your body gets used to it. A few times I dove down deep enough to be on the same level as some of the divers.

On our last day at sea, our last dive was coming up, and I was going to spend this dive snorkeling. We all got into the water and started going our separate ways. I was kind of swimming around aimlessly when I noticed a very large concrete block down on the sea floor. It was one of the weights our boat anchored to. It was pretty far down there. I decided I was going to try to get all the way down to it.

The first time I tried, I started swimming straight down just to see how far I could comfortably go. I wore a wetsuit that provided some buoyancy, and lungs full of air also helped keep me afloat. The deeper I went though, the more the water pressure compressed everything, so the buoyancy of my lungs and suit had less effect. I gave it a half-hearted shot, but got nowhere near my goal before I turned around and swam back to the surface.

I recovered on the surface for awhile, but wanted to try again. I took a few quick, deep breaths, and then surged straight down again. I kicked hard, driving deeper. I got much closer to the block on the floor, but started getting concerned about not having enough air to make it back, so again I turned around early and headed up. Coming up from the depths has the opposite effect of going deep; your buoyancy increases as you get closer to the surface. As I got shallower, I could feel myself rising through the water more quickly, even if I slowed my kicking.

I spent some more time resting and letting my breathing return to normal before making another shot without holding anything back. I did the quick breathing thing again and dove hard with the most air I could possibly fit into my lungs. Again, I swam hard straight down, pushing back more firmly against the nerves and survival instinct the deeper I went. The block on the ocean floor became larger and larger, and as I drew nearer I became more determined to reach it. It was almost within my reach!

Finally, after a swim straight down and what seemed like forever, I reached the block on the ocean floor. With a major sense of accomplishment, I flipped over and placed my feet on the block. I took a moment to look down at my feet on the concrete, then to look around at this place I had fought so hard to get to.

Then I looked up. If we could go back and see what I looked like, we’d probably see the color drain from my face. On a free dive, being the deepest you’ve ever been also means that you are physically the furthest away from oxygen that you’ve ever been. Never, either before or since, have I seen such a large aquatic distance that I had to cover so quickly. I became so focused on reaching my goal that I lost sight of the fact that the trip to the block was only half of the swim.

I shot off the block and began kicking furiously. I wasn’t far off the block before my lungs started burning. I kicked as hard as I could, and tried a few strokes with my arms, but that almost felt like it slowed me down. Have you ever held your breath so long that your diaphragm starts going into convulsions? It’s your body’s natural reflex, as though it’s trying to force you to take a breath. More than halfway up, my diaphragm started convulsing. It’s one thing if you’re sitting on the couch seeing how long you can hold your breath, but it’s different when the muscle controlling your lungs starts having spasms underwater, and I got worried that I wasn’t going to make the surface without inhaling a lungful of seawater.

As I tried to keep my body from betraying me, I noticed that I was rushing through the water. The air in my lungs and wetsuit had expanded enough that it was again making me buoyant, and my buoyancy was increasing as I moved toward the surface. The water at this point was rushing past my face, and I could feel its flow anywhere my skin was exposed to the water. Compared to being at depth, my lungs were now so full they felt like they were about to explode, yet the air within them was all but used up.

I needed air so badly that I didn’t even want to waste time exhaling after breaking the surface. With nothing left to spare, I blew out halfway just before breaking the surface and took the most grateful gasp of fresh air I’ve ever taken in my life. Looking back at my notes from the trip, I estimated at the time that the concrete block on the ocean floor was about 10-12 meters, or about 35 feet, below the surface.

My muscles were spent from the furious swim and the lack of oxygen, and I floated there panting as my wetsuit kept me from sinking. After resting awhile, I was able to swim back to the boat and make it safely aboard.

Have you ever thought about how, when you feel you’re doing everything you possibly can, and it’s still not enough, the Holy Spirit can cover the gap? The way the wetsuit worked is sort of the same way the Holy Spirit does; it’s there, wrapped around you and pushing you toward where you need to go. I’ve met amazing people that have endured unbelievable hardships that have drained them of any strength they held in reserve. When you ask them how they got through it, their answer usually has something to do God’s grace. It might be “peace that passes understanding.” Hearing their story and knowing that they withstood things that would make the average person buckle or tap out reminds me that the Holy Spirit empowers Christ-followers with the things they need for the task at hand, even if that task is nothing more ordinary than to make it through the day.

This isn’t just for people with extraordinary stories, like Samson or King David; it’s for you and I, too. When we’re in the midst of excruciating trials or facing an insurmountable obstacle, God gives us what we need to “make it back to the surface.” Then, when it’s all over and we’re completely spent, He’s there keeping us afloat while we catch our breath, sustaining us long enough for us to make it back to safety.

“Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God.” Romans 8:26-27

“And when they had prayed, the place where they were assembled together was shaken; and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, and they spoke the word of God with boldness.”Acts 4:31

The Land Down Under

Upon graduation from college and unsure of a career path to pursue, I moved back in with Mom and Dad. I worked construction during that time, and since I had low overhead, I was able to make tons of progress paying off my college loans. Free of any major responsibilities and feeling adventurous at this point, I decided to start making headway on my lofty goal of visiting every continent.

My folks had taken me to Europe previously, so I could cross that one off the list. I knew that at some point in the future I was more likely to have additional responsibilities (and might have to pay for additional tickets if I were to go traveling), so I determined it would be good to look at the continents that were the most difficult to get to. I really wanted to visit Antarctica, but I figured it would probably be best to get some general travel experience before venturing anywhere near the South Pole. Deciding that it would be nice to go to an English-speaking country, I settled on Australia.

I found an adventure company that did tours all over the world, and they had a few Australian trips coming up. On the agenda for this particular trip was whitewater rafting, hiking and mountain biking in a rainforest, a few days on the Great Barrier Reef, and ocean kayaking out to, then spending a few nights camping on, an island off the Australian coast. I got signed up for a November trip.

While trees are losing leaves and the weather’s getting chilly in North America in November, it’s springtime in the southern hemisphere. Add to that the fact that the area where most of this trip took place was closer to the equator than Jamaica is, and it looked like I was going to have a tan at Thanksgiving.

That figure is for a direct flight; it doesn’t count connecting flights!

The trip ended up being a lot of fun, and I had some neat experiences. I’ll cover a few of them in the next couple of posts, but for now it’s important to remember that even if you ride in a plane to the other side of the world almost 10,000 miles away, God’s still the same God He was before you left.

Whether you’re having a “Jonah” moment and are trying to run away, or are homesick, afraid, and want to see something familiar, God’s still God no matter where you go.

7Where can I go from Your Spirit?
         Or where can I flee from Your presence?

8If I ascend to heaven, You are there;
         If I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there.

9If I take the wings of the dawn,
         If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea,

10Even there Your hand will lead me,
         And Your right hand will lay hold of me.

11If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me,
         And the light around me will be night,”

12Even the darkness is not dark to You,
         And the night is as bright as the day.
         Darkness and light are alike to You.

Psalm 139:7-12

This Isn’t a Game; This is for Real

In the military, especially in units that operate fighter aircraft, there’s something called a “show of force.” This is a tactic that was used a lot in Iraq and Afghanistan early in our military’s operations in those countries. A show of force is when a very maneuverable plane gets low to the ground, goes full throttle, and flies as close as possible past the enemy on the ground.

If you’re on the receiving end, this tactic is not something that will physically affect you; there are no shots fired and there’s typically no ordnance dropped. If you’re unaccustomed to sudden loud noises, though, it’s something that will make you wet your pants. The idea behind a show of forces is simply to make you cower in fear and, at least for a little while, make you stop doing what you were doing while you question your life decisions.

A few years back I experienced a spiritual show of force. I had been working for a few weeks to prepare a talk for a group at church. To use another military analogy, to “red-team” something means to examine your own capabilities/facilities from the perspective of the enemy, taking the opportunity to uncover weaknesses and vulnerabilities. For the talk I had been preparing, I focused on “red-teaming humanity” from the perspective of Satan and his fallen angels. If you’re familiar with C.S. Lewis’s The Screwtape Letters, it was kind of like that, but delivered in the form of a brief/presentation.

At first I thought it was a cool idea. It was neat to gauge Humanity’s collective spiritual weaknesses. The problem was that to do it effectively, you have to think like you’re a member of the bad guys’ team, and that becomes uncomfortable and even troubling to do for an extended period of time when you have Christ living in you. As the time drew near for me to present the project, I was excited to share what I had prepared, but I was very eager to be done with it.

I know I’m jumping all over the place and mixing metaphors, but I need to throw another one at you. Imagine you’re on a professional football team, and somehow your team gets hold of your opponent’s playbook. You’d be ecstatic, but if the other team found out, they’d do just about anything to keep you from exploiting it. I had put together a brief that was going to show some of the basic strategies from the Devil’s playbook. I even thought “you know, leading up to this brief, it wouldn’t be surprising if I had some sort of experience that was a little outside the norm.”

I had no idea at the time, but I was spot on. Less than a week before I was to give the talk, I experienced the show of force.

I was at a gas station, getting my car inspected. There was a spot inside the gas station where people could hang out while their cars were in the garage. I was sitting there, doing stuff on my phone, when the door opened and someone walked in. I didn’t look up, but I heard a woman start speaking strangely. I assumed two people had walked in, or that she was speaking to someone nearby. There are a lot of weirdos around, so I didn’t look up; I assumed she was speaking to someone she knew. Still looking at my phone, I was surprised when she reached down and touched my arm. I was startled to look up and see her staring down at me with a pretty intense look.

She seemed a little bit like she wasn’t playing with a full deck, if you know what I mean. I don’t even remember what she said next, but I totally blew her off. She walked past me and sat down on a chair behind me.

I wasn’t sure what to make of the whole situation, but as I refocused on whatever I was doing on my phone, I started thinking about some of our pastor’s main themes of his then-current series: don’t stay silent; engage.

I kind of worked my way up to it, then turned to face this woman. I was caught off guard to see that she wasn’t sitting like a normal person. She was sort of sliding off the chair, rigid, with both arms stretched behind her unnaturally and her head tilted far back.

I plowed ahead anyway. I asked her about one of the strange words I remembered her saying. Thus began a bizarre encounter that I don’t even remember very much of. I do remember that without me giving any indication of my spiritual beliefs, she started ripping on Jesus Christ pretty hard. She behaved very unnaturally and aggressively tried to persuade me that Christianity was false and misleading.

This went on for a few minutes, and I can’t even tell you how glad I was when the guy told me that my car was ready. I didn’t even care whether it passed or failed; I popped up out of my seat and started walking his way. The woman suddenly became very adamant about touching my hand. “Let me shake your hand.” I declined, and she extended her hand quite urgently, saying “I need to touch you.” I later recounted these events to my pastor, and when I asked him what that part was all about, he explained that some people believe they can transfer spirits from one person to another by touching. Now, because God only allows demonic forces to go so far, I don’t think that would have been a concern, but let me tell you…I had absolutely no problem skipping out of there without saying a cordial goodbye.

Friends, I don’t know if this has occurred to you, but we’re in a war. There’s a whole lot out there that our senses cannot perceive. Looking at the last 10, 20, or 30 years, it seems like the dark forces are the ones making all the moves and all the noise (has our country moved toward or away from Christianity during that time?). To use another metaphor, imagine there’s a fire that needs to be put out, and that God’s Holy Spirit takes the form of a nearby lake. The water to extinguish that fire is present, but without something the Holy Spirit can fill, a vessel of some sort (Christians), the water does nothing to fight the fire. Please don’t misunderstand me; I’m not saying that God is powerless without us, but I am saying that He chooses to work through us. When we allow God to work through us, we become that cup, that jug, that bucket, or that fire hose that gets filled with the Holy Spirit and gets to have a front-row seat when God fights the fire. Are you going to be a part of something big when God invites you along to strike at the powers of darkness, or are you going to put your feet up and watch TV?

Here’s part of one of my favorite Bible stories from the Old Testament. When an enemy king and his army tried to attack Israel, God spoke through the prophet Elisha to warn the Israelite king, who was then able to effectively counter the enemy’s moves multiple times. Naturally, this frustrated the enemy king, and he wanted to capture Elisha to increase his chances of success. The most exciting part of the story is the perspective of Elisha’s servant:

One of his servants said, “No, my lord, O king; but Elisha, the prophet who is in Israel, tells the king of Israel the words that you speak in your bedroom.” So he said, “Go and see where he is, that I may send and take him.” And it was told him, saying, “Behold, he is in Dothan.” He sent horses and chariots and a great army there, and they came by night and surrounded the city.

Now when the attendant of the man of God had risen early and gone out, behold, an army with horses and chariots was circling the city. And his servant said to him, “Alas, my master! What shall we do?” So he answered, “Do not fear, for those who are with us are more than those who are with them.” Then Elisha prayed and said, “O LORD, I pray, open his eyes that he may see.” And the LORD opened the servant’s eyes and he saw; and behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. -2 Kings 6:12-17

There’s more going on than what you can see. You’re smack dab in the middle of a war. While it’s very important to have a sober respect for the enemy’s power, don’t be put off by a show of force. Ask that God “fill this vessel,” and that you have the boldness to live out your faith and your calling. When you do, there’s no telling how God will use you to fight the enemy’s fire.

You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. -1 John 4:4

Too Small To Make a Difference

We’ve got a fireplace at home, and we like having fires once it gets cold. Buying or collecting wood for the fireplace can be a hassle though, and this year we happened upon a different solution. Earlier this summer a nearby neighborhood cut down a lot of trees and sliced the trunks into slabs, leaving them to rot throughout the neighborhood. I actually enjoy splitting wood by hand (especially after aggravating days at work), so I went and picked up a bunch of them and brought them home for splitting and burning.

The problem is that I don’t have an efficient method of splitting the wood. Most people know what an ax is, but not everyone knows what a maul is. A maul is kind of like a sledgehammer with a wedge on one side. When I first started splitting wood earlier this summer though, I didn’t have a full-sized maul. The one I have is meant for splitting pieces of wood that have already been split, but are still a bit too big for the fireplace. It’s kind of a hand-held “mini-maul.”

This tool is great for splitting branches or small trunks that are, say, the diameter of a coffee-can. Once you get into dealing with slabs of trunk though, it becomes much more difficult.

I had a slab I was determined to split up, but it was so big I couldn’t even put my arms around it. Nonetheless, I put it on top of another piece and started looking at the natural grain of the wood, then started taking shots at it. At first the mini-maul just bounced off the wood. A few more shots, and each time the mini maul bounced. Each time the tool struck the wood, though, it left a pock mark. I started striking the slab in a way that the pock marks lined up to create a fault line across it. I didn’t really feel like I was making much progress, so I turned the slab and started doing the same thing in a different direction. Then I did it in yet another direction.

I struck the wood over and over and over again. Sometimes the tool bounced and other times it started penetrating into the wood. I was out there for a long time. My hands got sore and hot, like blisters were starting to form. I was tired, and eventually my shirt was so soaked with sweat that it had almost no dry spots, and I thought about packing it in. I must’ve left nearly a hundred pock marks before anything began happening.

Finally, the sound of the impact changed, and a crack emerged. When it did, it breathed new life into my effort.

Once the crack was established, it was easy to exploit into a split, and things moved quickly from there. After splitting it in two, it only took a few shots to make additional splits in one of the two sides. Those smaller chunks became infinitely easier to break into the size I wanted, often in a single blow.

In the end, this little tool was able to deliver enough targeted force to smash a strong, sturdy slab of oak into about 35 splinters that were shadows of what they once were. All of them were done in by the persistent strikes of a tool that was “too small” to do the job.

It’s an alarming spiritual analogy for those things we do that we know we shouldn’t be doing. It might not be anything major, but it happens again and again. Call it the straw that broke the camel’s back, or call it death by a thousand paper cuts. It’s something that doesn’t seem too bad, in and of itself. It’s not a crushing blow, but it’s something that delivers targeted strike after targeted strike against your Christian walk and, if it’s not stopped, has the ability to cause major damage to your spiritual health and relationships.

Maybe it’s gossip. It could be reading a certain kind of novel. Maybe it’s a glance that lingers longer than it should. Perhaps it’s tension in your marriage that goes unresolved and festers. Doing these things a single time is not something that’s devastating to your spiritual walk, but each of them is something that leaves a pock mark. You may have even told yourself “it’s not a big deal, it doesn’t hurt anybody.” Well, maybe doing it once isn’t a big deal, but have you only done it once? Consider whether your pock marks are aligning in a way that will lead to cracks and problems in the future, maybe soon.

Is there something you’re doing that you know you shouldn’t be doing? If you’re wrapped up in something that hinders your ministry or God-given purpose, even just a little bit, it can affect your ability to make your maximum impact for Christ’s kingdom. Like athletes that train hard to compete at a high level, cut yourself off from things you know aren’t helping you. Don’t run for third place, or for second place; run to win.

Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. –Hebrews 12:1-2

I demolished each of these pieces of wood using that mini maul. If you feel you’ve stripped the unneeded junk out of your life, how can you help the “other pieces of wood” around you to do the same, so that they can better resist the onslaught of strikes that hit them every day?

Can Your Teacher Teach?

Photo courtesy of YouTube

A few summers in my teens/early 20s I drove a ski boat at a Christian conference center on the Delaware River between Pennsylvania and New Jersey. The vast majority of the people I drove came for tubing rides, but every now and then there were people that wanted to waterski.

If they were experienced waterskiers, it wasn’t a problem. They knew what to do, I knew how to drive for it, and it usually worked out pretty well.

On the other hand, it was much more difficult when beginners gave it a shot. We had a limited selection of ski sizes, so if the skier was small/light, they usually struggled to get into a good starting position. Just wrestling with the skis while trying to stay in the right “crouched” position was usually enough to get both the skier and the driver frustrated. Add to this the fact that their teacher…me…had never been successful at waterskiing, and it’s no surprise that I can probably count on one hand the number of people that were able to ski for the first time under my tutelage over the course of two or three summers. Sometimes it’s true what they say: those that can’t do…teach.

If you want to learn something from someone, you’d expect your instructor…regardless of what they’re instructing…to be proficient at it, wouldn’t you? I grew up near that conference center and since I was a kid I’d hung out by the river and heard lots of different boat drivers describe to beginners how to get up and out of the water on waterskis. The problem was that I didn’t have any experience doing it myself, so it was very difficult for me to successfully translate that theoretical knowledge into something usable for someone else.

In the Christian life we’re supposed to devote ourselves to passionately pursuing Christ. In the twelfth chapter of the book of Mark, someone asked Jesus what the greatest commandment is. He responded in verse 30 “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your mind and all your soul and all your strength.” Pursue Christ with everything you’ve got, but while you’re doing it, make sure that the sources you’re learning from, getting excited by, gaining encouragement from, and using to be renewed are credible sources. Some of the enemy’s greatest weapons employ half-truths or sound like they’re religious, but are in fact more misleading and damaging than flat-out lies.

The voices you’re listening to…are they walking the walk, or only talking the talk?