Tag: holiday

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If I Can’t Walk, Then I’m Crawling

In honor of the upcoming Memorial Day holiday, I’ll share a military-themed post. When I was younger I really enjoyed the movie “Saving Private Ryan.” It’s a story that took place during World War II in Europe, and starred Tom Hanks as Army Captain John Miller.

Throughout the movie Miller had led men against formidable obstacles; he was always able to get his team past the obstacle, but each time someone paid for it with their life. There’s a lot more to the story than this, but at the end of the movie, Captain Miller and a small group of soldiers find themselves vastly outnumbered and outgunned while defending an important bridge from an enemy onslaught.

It’s a losing battle. During the clash we repeatedly witness the demise of characters we’ve known for most of the movie, all while valiantly trying to defend either the bridge or each other. The enemy forces continue advancing, and the bridge appears as though it’s about to fall to the enemy.

As a last resort, the Americans have wired explosives to the bridge to prevent the enemy from using it. When it became apparent that the Americans couldn’t hold the bridge, they decided to destroy it. Retreating across the river, Miller prepared to activate the detonator, but in the process was mortally wounded and unable to set off the explosives. With an enemy tank about to begin moving across the bridge, Miller, unable to stand, leaned himself up against some debris and pulled out his sidearm. With nothing left to do, he began firing a pistol at an advancing tank.

  • CAPT Miller in “Saving Private Ryan”
  • CAPT Miller in “Saving Private Ryan”

I don’t want to spoil the ending if you haven’t seen it, but how do you get to the point where you’re trying to stop a tank with a pistol? Miller was a man that simply did not give up once he had made up his mind about an objective. There was no quit in him. He fought the way he could make the maximum impact, and once that method failed or circumstances changed, he switched to the next most effective method. He adjusted his approach as his men and resources dwindled. As he sat on a bridge bleeding out, the only option available to him, his last-ditch effort, was to pull out his pistol and start firing at a tank. This was all he had left.

This man was determined, and makes me reflect on my own life. Do I have determination like that? Am I giving my all, even if I don’t have much left? If I can’t run, am I at least walking toward where I need to go? When I can’t walk, am I crawling?

There’s much work to be done. We’ll have setbacks. Our resources and assets will change, reducing or increasing our capability to do things at a given point in time. Are we letting the loss of those things, or a self-defeating attitude get in the way from us making progress toward where we need to go? Don’t stop. Keep pushing forward, even if it’s at a crawl.

This Monday is Memorial Day. There are a whole lot of men and women who gave their all for us; some didn’t make it back, while others are no longer what they used to be. Thank a vet today.

Just a reminder…after Memorial Day, I’ll be switching to a once-a-week posting format. Have a happy and safe holiday weekend!

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Valentine’s Day Gift

Ever think about how you don’t need help getting into trouble? Ever notice how you don’t need to teach kids to do bad stuff? For example, did you show them how to lie, or did they just kind of figure that one out on their own?

My son has told us some lies before. These were like, blatant, totally unprompted lies. He’s a little more slick about it these days, but when he was just a little guy, he once said “I don’t have anything in my mouth” after he got into a bag of chips without our permission. His mouth was…you guessed it…full of chips! On another occasion he was supposed to be up in his room napping. When he came down, without us saying anything, he told us “I wasn’t looking out the window.”

Dude, at least make it hard for us.

Most of the time instructions and laws seem to be phrased in negative terms. “Don’t lie.” “Don’t cheat.” It’s much more rare to have laws that are positive in nature. Most of the Ten Commandments are the same way. Only two of them are phrased in the positive (remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy; respect your father and mother).

Elsewhere in the Bible God gives other instructions. Sometimes He says stuff that’s intuitive or obvious. Other times He tells us stuff that maybe we’ve heard or read a few times, but we still miss it even though it’s something we ought to know and need some help learning.

Valentine’s Day presents the opportunity to reflect on one such instruction.

In many marriages, you can ask the husband “does your wife love you?” Often he’ll answer “well, yeah, sure she does.” Probe a little further, though, and you might identify a problem. “Does she respect you?” The answer probably doesn’t come as quickly, and if he doesn’t feel as though his wife respects him, there could be an issue.

Hang on though, guys, ‘cuz you’re not perfect, either. Stick with me, there’s a Biblical basis for this. The opposite is often true for wives. She might feel sufficiently respected, but she might not quite feel loved. (There’s a difference between knowing you’re loved and feeling that you’re loved.)

Regardless of whether you’re a male or female breadwinner, “working all day just to put food on the table and keep a roof over our heads” is great, but isn’t the only thing your significant other needs from you.

If either one isn’t getting what they need, that person is running at an emotional deficit. Wives, maybe you respect your husbands, but he may not feel it. Husbands, of course you love your wives, but you need to make her know it and believe it. For everybody…your spouse needs what they need; just because you don’t feel like you require extra love/respect doesn’t mean they can go without it. Don’t cut them off from what they need just because you look at them through the prism of you.

Take a look at the book of Ephesians. In chapter 5, God tells us (in positive verbiage) what to do. He doesn’t give us a “don’t,” he gives us a “do.” These days the first part is easy to misconstrue as being outdated and part of the “toxic masculinity” you hear about in men’s razor commercials. Don’t twist it; read the whole thing. Right on the heels of talking about how to live with and treat other Christians, the author turns his attention to household relationships in verses 22-33.

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might [g]sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30 For we are members of His body, [h]of His flesh and of His bones. 31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Note how it doesn’t say “husbands, respect your wives,” or “wives, love your husbands.” Why not? Because most of the time, those things aren’t the shortfalls. We’re probably already doing them. This passage guides us to do something that doesn’t come naturally.

There’s a whole study on this topic called “Love and Respect” by Emerson Eggerichs. I’ve never read the book, but the DVD series was phenomenal. “Pink and Blue…not wrong…just different.” Great stuff for a small group setting or Sunday School class.

If you haven’t been offering what your spouse needs, and then you start providing it, watch how powerful an agent it can be. Flowers and chocolates are great and all, but how about this year, you make a concerted effort to deliver what your spouse or significant other really needs?

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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That Was Almost Me!

In honor of the real reason behind the upcoming Christmas holiday, I’m going to share a story from my life that illustrates someone else’s sacrifice on my behalf. This particular experience drives home the point of Jesus taking my place like nothing else does.

Before I joined the Air Force I worked in construction, building houses. The Air Force was very particular and thorough about documenting the types of injuries, surgeries, and other aspects of recruits’ medical history. All of a potential recruit’s medical history paperwork needed to be in good order before they could even leave for basic training. I don’t remember how many times I had to fill out specific forms, but I remember that it was a pain to get it all completed.

Everyone at work knew that I was joining the Air Force, but the job I wanted wasn’t scheduled to have room for new Airmen for several months, so while I was waiting, all I had to do was not get hurt. I worked in construction. What could go wrong?

Our crew was framing a house, which was one of my favorite parts of building it, even though it was also one of the most physically strenuous. We had finished the first floor, and we were just about to start work on the second. What we usually did at this point was have a guy start lifting the decking…a beefed-up version of plywood…up to someone on the second floor. Once we got most of the decking installed on the second floor, we could start moving other supplies up there.

This time we did something a little different. I don’t remember exactly why, but we had a backhoe on site. Rather than pass the sheets of decking up one at a time, we threw a chain around a bunch of the sheets and connected it to the backhoe’s arm. We were going to use the machine to lift a bunch of the decking up to the second floor all at once. If this worked out, it was going to save us a lot of work.

The backhoe operator drove around to the part of the house that was closest to being able to reach the second floor. He moved into place and began positioning the arm so that two of us up top could pull the sheets out of the stack. I was one of the guys, and I had gone to high school with the other guy, Jared. Jared was the kind of guy that had been working on job sites and picking up extra cash since he was a kid. He had worked on more roofs, houses, and barns than he could remember. He just had a sixth sense about how building supplies needed to fit together and how the process needed to go.

The two of us stood on top of the second floor, waiting to receive the first sheets. We had no floor to stand on yet; we had to balance on the rafters that were 16 inches apart. We watched as the backhoe operator extended the backhoe’s arm as high as it would go, only to come up a few inches short. We talked it over for a bit, and decided we’d try tipping the bundle just enough that we could pull a sheet up toward us. We didn’t like the idea of dealing with a tipped bundle, but it was better than lifting the sheets up one by one.

This idea might have worked if we used a magical chain that tightened around the bundle a little bit as each sheet came out. Think of a deck of cards that’s held in place not with a rubber band, but with a string that’s tied tightly around the outside. As we tried tipping the bundle just enough to pull a sheet up onto where we stood, the sheets in the middle of the bundle started sliding toward the cab of the backhoe. Out of self-preservation, the operator jerked the arm to stop the decking from smashing into him, but in the process it made the bucket smash into the wall holding up the rafters Jared and I stood on. It broke the wall loose and in about three seconds there would be nothing holding us up anymore.

Jared was quicker to understand everything that was happening, and he started tearing across the rafters with a quickness. He slowed down long enough to grab me and get me moving in the right direction, because I had to spin 180 degrees to be pointed toward safety. He pulled me onto my feet and gave me a big shove, providing the momentum I needed to reach a different section of the building that wasn’t in danger of collapsing. The big shove he gave me killed his momentum toward safety though. It all happened so fast that I don’t remember everything that occurred, but the wall gave way, and so did the rafters holding us up. As I was falling, I was just barely able to reach out and grab a beam that wasn’t affected by the wall’s collapse. I was running across rafters that were on their way down as I reached it. It was just in the nick of time, too; it was a last-ditch leap to grab something sturdy enough to save me from disaster.

Jared, however, did NOT make it to safety. He ended up tumbling from the second floor to the first in the middle of a mass of collapsing lumber. He suffered a fall he could have escaped because he stopped long enough to give me a chance I wouldn’t have had without him. He could have made it without a problem if he only looked after himself, but without even thinking he helped keep me from getting hurt. If I could go back in time and grab a picture of the scene, it would have been a powerful one to see Jared getting buried in an avalanche of two-by-sixes and two-by-eights as I safely swung from a cross beam just feet away, thanks to him.

This event made me understand the word “sacrifice” in a different light. I always knew the Bible stories about God sacrificing His son. After awhile, you forget to appreciate what an awesomely painful thing that was for Him to do. Then something like this happens and you see it in a whole new light.

How do you pay someone back after something like that?

You can’t.

If you haven’t invited Jesus Christ to be the Lord of your life, that doesn’t change the fact that He paid a heavy price to offer you a tremendous gift. To be honest, He knew that many people wouldn’t take Him up on it, and He knew that some people would knowingly reject it. I can’t imagine not being thankful to Jared after what he did. It also helped remind me of how much more thankful I need to be for an even bigger act of selflessness.

This Christmas don’t forget to pause and give thanks to God for the significance of what we’re actually celebrating during this time of year. Christ’s birth marked the start of a plan that would result in a painful and tormenting sacrifice that opened the door for you and for me to gain entry into Heaven. The concept of painful separation from God after death is our default status as humans, but Christ’s sacrifice created the only way for us to avoid that future and instead spend eternity with Him in Heaven.

Just for the sake of closure, Jared was okay, but he was pretty mad and stayed on the floor for awhile. I dropped from the beam and ran toward him, throwing planks every which way to get him uncovered. He scared me when I found him in the fetal position…I kept asking him to say something, but he stayed quiet. I think he was pretty upset at seeing the problem coming and still having to deal with it. We later joked about how tough Jared was. He’s the only guy I know that you can drop a house on and he keeps on going. 🙂

This is my last post of 2018. Enjoy time together with loved ones this season; hold them tighter and don’t take them for granted. Talk about big, impossible ideas of how you can labor for God’s glory. Spur one another on. I’ll resume posting the first or second week of the new year.

In the words of a different, more famous Tim, “God Bless us, every one!”

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Happy Thanksgiving

Today I’d like to do something a little different.

I’ve been posting to this blog for a little more than a month and a half now. Even though I’m the main author, I don’t think that I should be the only one with some input.

In the coming weeks, I’d like to figure out a way to enable some discussion. It’s fun for me to think back on some of these experiences, but my main goal in sharing these posts is to encourage you to step out in faith to act on the idea(s) God’s been placing in your life. While I believe it’s good for me to start the discussion, I believe the real value is going to be in readers echoing the points I highlight; I think people would benefit from some “testimonials” from other people that they, too, have experienced the things I’m writing about.

For some of you, I’m just a guy that writes stories about the crazy things he’s seen or done. For others though, I’m a portion of the overall way God might be speaking to you about something He’d like you to embark upon. I’ll be honest, I have no clue what God would like for you to do, but with your talents, interests, and resources, you can make a profound difference when you fulfill the role God is offering you.

Remember my challenge from the last post: the idea that you keep coming back to, that thing God’s been whispering in your ear that you can’t get away from…tell someone about it. I’m embedding the same video from last time. If it helps, use it as a way to start the discussion with someone while you’re with them this holiday.

I Have To – Promotional Trailer from Christy Fay on Vimeo.

If, at this point you don’t have any ideas of what you’re supposed to do, you can still put your creativity or other gifts to work. Here are some ideas you can work on:

  • Many people that are open to hearing about Jesus and the Bible feel uncomfortable walking into a church; is there a way you can either make church feel less intimidating for them, or is there a way you can bring church to people on their terms?
  • It’s very rare for people to have a “BANG!” kind of conversion experience. The truth is, many people are searching for the truth, and keep coming back to Christianity for one reason or another, but they often need time to wrestle with the things they’re hearing and learning from church and other Christian leaders. Can you think of a way to reach, assist, and encourage those individuals, either virtually or face-to-face?
  • In just about any aspect of life, there are people with abilities and resources, and there are people with needs. Within your sphere of influence, can you come up with a way to match them to each other?
  • The older people among us have seen and been a part of incredible things, and have a valuable amount of life experience. The younger people among us have energy, enthusiasm, and are fluent in technology. How can we marry experience, enthusiasm, and skillsets to accomplish amazing things for God’s glory? If you’re not up for cracking the code on this one, consider making at least one friend from every decade of life, and challenge others to do the same.
  • Help explain to me how to set up a discussion page on WordPress. 🙂 If that won’t work, will comments be enough for readers to encourage and cheer on other readers? Would it work better on the Dare Greatly Now Facebook page?

There are lots of ways to employ your gifts, these are just a few examples that require constant energy and effort from people. I’m hopeful that having fresh sets of eyes will come up with new, creative solutions. If none of them sound quite right to you, and you see some other problem staring you in the face, maybe that’s your calling. You’re the only one that can do everything you can do. If you don’t do it, you’re leaving some of your potential unfulfilled.

Today I have much to be thankful for. One of the biggest things is that God has equipped us with different talents, resources, interests, and spiritual gifts. Not only does He hand us these things, but He gives us the free will to choose to use (or not use) them for His glory. He won’t make you do it by forcing you to become some grudgingly compliant subordinate. He invites you to come along, making you a willing (and often, excited) volunteer!

Another thing for which I’m thankful is the difference that you can make if you accept the challenge God gives you. As a Christian, there’s a power living inside of you that’s greater than you can imagine. Don’t stifle it. Letting it go unused is like leaving a Lamborghini locked in the garage. Turn it loose and get a taste of what that engine can do.

Happy Thanksgiving to all!