Category: Parenthood

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Out of Tune and Out of Sync

My kids are old enough that at this point they’ve all played instruments in the school band/orchestra. While I have to admit the concerts during those early years can make the audience cringe from time to time, it’s much more enjoyable to attend concerts after those musicians gain a few years of experience. A couple of my kiddos have done well enough with their music to make the cut into groups requiring an audition, and those concerts are the fun ones to attend.

Maybe you’ve had kids (or a sibling) in some kind of concert band/orchestra; as a concert draws near, you hear them at home rehearsing the same parts over and over. They get smoother with time, but you still only hear the same parts repeated time and again. This goes on and on until the concert finally arrives.

Before the concert begins it’s common to hear the musicians warming up on stage. At first it’s the sound of a weird, jumbled mess of all kinds of different instruments doing their own thing according to their own timing. It’s certainly not a polished sound. The conductor or other music teacher is usually running around, helping students do last-minute tunings. Then, as the warm-up nears its end, the conductor takes the podium and has each section play a few different notes. It’s interesting to me how the conductor can detect an instrument out there somewhere that’s not tuned correctly, and he or she will have the different students of that section play, one at a time, until they’ve found the errant instrument and made adjustments.

Finally, after introductions, the conductor once again takes the podium and indicates to the musicians to prepare to play. The conductor is usually the most interesting person to watch. I’ve seen a number of them in the concerts my kids have been a part of. Sometimes they’re energetic, other times not so much. Some are very straight-laced, and others have a little more flair. They’re all very talented, and they try to coax excellence out of their musicians.

Depending on the size of the group of students, the conductor has a lot to keep an eye on. The kids all have different energy levels for a concert. Some are calm beyond their years. Others have nervous energy that leaks out in the form of a foot that doesn’t stop tapping, a knee that doesn’t stop bouncing, or a head that doesn’t stop bobbing or swaying. The conductor has to manage the enthusiasm of the entire body. Many times the energy accompanying the excitement of the evening nearly boils over, and the pace or volume needs to be reigned in a little bit. Later in the concert, maybe in a section where one of the students wasn’t able to show up for the concert, the others in that section need to come up with a little more than they otherwise would have. It’s fun to see when the conductor points to a section and beckons them silently, but urgently, as if to say “c’mon, I need more from you!” As the piece builds and builds, it gets to the point the conductor has been waiting for, where their arms flail about and they nod their head emphatically as if to say “now!”

Part of the real enjoyment of a concert is the fact that all these musicians are contributing to something larger than themselves. Those parts my kids have been practicing over and over are definitely audible, but I also hear plenty of parts from other instruments I haven’t been hearing at home. Those parts are stitched together to produce something none of the individual instruments could have produced on their own. At some point in a good concert I’m just kind of overcome with awe: “This is how it’s supposed to be. Everyone’s doing something different, but they’re all working together toward a common goal.”

It’s a beautiful metaphor for the body of Christ. Even though we might possess similar gifts as others and might be grouped into sections, we still play a variety of instruments. Some are gifted at evangelism while others excel at teaching. Certain people have the gift of helps, or hospitality, or exhortation; others possess talents like administration, leadership, or compassion. Even the odd instruments that don’t have an appealing sound (like the slapper or the clunky bells with a tinny sound) contribute beneficially to the piece. They often punctuate the music in a memorable way. Yep, we have lots of those folks in the body of Christ, and I’m thankful for them!

Through all of this, the most important thing is to keep your eyes on the conductor. It’s easy to get distracted by the person next to you, or getting too far ahead of yourself thinking about the difficult part coming up, or even having your timing thrown off. Watching the conductor keeps you grounded and dealing only with the here and now, it keeps you on the right beat, and it tells you when to start and when to stop. Don’t lose sight of the one who can see everybody and who’s holding everything together. Follow the conductor’s lead and you’ll contribute something beautiful to something larger than yourself.

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Alright, it’s Time To Go; Everybody out the Door!

It’s funny just how much kids can teach you about God’s dealings with us.

I’ve got three kids; a girl, a boy, and another girl. They all have different approaches when they know it’s time to leave the house.

My oldest is very deliberate, and spends a lot of time planning to avoid feeling rushed. As long as she knows the departure time, she’ll work backwards from there to calculate time for clothes, time for hair, time for gathering necessities, etc.

My son doesn’t take much time to get ready. After years of urging him to prepare, get shoes on, and use the bathroom in preparation for departure, he’s demonstrated that as long as he knows what’s coming, there’s really no need to call him until we’re about 60 seconds from actually walking out the door.

My youngest is funny. We’ll warn her about our impending departure, but she’ll stay wrapped up in a book for as long as possible. When we tell her it’s time to get shoes on because we’re leaving, that’s when she goes and packs a snack and some water. We end up waiting for her because her idea of “time to go” doesn’t jive with ours.

Based on their three different personalities, we treat them differently when we know about a deadline or timeframe we want to adhere to. The three of them need different sets of guardrails to arrive at the same end state. Their approach might be to have all questions answered before formulating a detailed plan, agreeing to the task without having much information at all, or just bobbing along with whatever today brings.

Now, keeping that parenting analogy in mind, how great is it to be known by a Creator who understands us better than we do? He knows what motivates us, what overwhelms us, what inspires us, and what deflates us. He knows exactly what we need when it’s time to get us moving in a certain direction.

Similarly, we’re all offered different opportunities to take part in building Christ’s kingdom throughout our Christian lives. We’re not required to do them, but different sets of blessings and challenges come along with each one. God already knows which of those opportunities we’ll take part in and which of them we’ll decline. He offers us invitations that are easy to accept, and others which prove to be more difficult. I imagine that while He enjoys seeing us accept those easy ones, it brings Him genuine joy to see us choose to accept the hard ones.

So the next time you know God’s extending a challenge to you, even if it’s one you don’t want to accept, why don’t you take a closer look at taking Him up on it? He knows you better than you do, and He’s going to give you everything you need to take on that challenge. Either in this life or the next, there’s a special blessing for you on the other side of your obedience.

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You’ve Got Me Seeing Stars

I enjoyed showing various video clips to my kids when they were little. When she was a toddler, I showed my youngest daughter a computer-generated animation accompanied by “Twinkle, twinkle little star.” It was slow-paced, so it easily held the attention of young little eyes. This particular version, about two and a half minutes long, featured an owl who looked up at the night sky and decided to fly up high to get a better look at a star hovering above.

As he flew to a great height, the star came to greet him. The two new friends frolicked along the tops of clouds for a bit, to the owl’s great enjoyment. It was utter happiness for the two, sharing these magical moments. Alas, all things come to an end, and eventually the owl began to fall back to earth as the star watched, waving goodbye, ending this brief friendship.

My daughter watched, captivated, until this part. As she saw the look in the owl’s eyes, along with the star’s farewell wave, a profound sadness came over her and she began to cry. This was a completely unexpected reaction. Of course children want to be in the presence of their own mother from a very young age, but it turns out even a child too young to write her name understands the importance of togetherness and the pain of separation in others. Communion and fellowship are hardwired into us; we need others.

After we slip from this life into the next, there are only two possibilities for how we’ll spend eternity. The first is joyful bliss in the everlasting presence of the Lord. The second is the shock and pain of isolation from Him. When we picture Hell, we often think of fire. While eternal smoke from unbelievers is described in the Bible (Revelation 14:11), I think we usually miss the fact that folks in this category have no chance of ever getting right with, and spending time with the Almighty, other than standing before Him in judgment. While Christians can rest in the idea of Christ’s love, those who reject Him will themselves be rejected and cast into an existence of separation from Him (and likely everyone else).

Just a little reminder of what’s at stake here. You might very well be the only person to speak Christ to someone else. Don’t worry about messing it up. They’re already facing the worst-case scenario: eternity separated from the Lord. You can’t make it any worse, but you can help them gain the only thing that matters. Start a conversation today.

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A Vivid Reminder of His Goodness in my Life

Years back our family took its first plane trip. We visited family in Colorado, had a lot of fun, enjoyed our time quite a bit, and went to the Denver airport for our return trip as travel pros.

I have a gigantic book of Sudoku puzzles I brought with me on that trip. I’d dink around with it on and off during the flight. Trying to switch things up to reduce boredom for our kids, we moved them around to different seats part way through the flight. My youngest daughter, who was four years old at the time, would be sitting next to me for the landing.

During final approach when we started to really drop in altitude, she developed a nose bleed. It was the worst possible time to do it, too. The seatbelt signs were on, the flight attendants were all buckled in, and I didn’t have any tissues or napkins or anything. I called to my wife across the aisle, hoping she’d have some tissues. She did, but they were in her purse, stowed in the overhead bin.

It was such a helpless feeling, not being able to help my little girl when she needed me and couldn’t do anything to help herself. To my great relief, someone in the row behind me heard what was happening and gave us some of her tissues (thank you!).

Once we got home again, we unpacked our things, did all kinds of laundry and grocery shopping, and life began to return to normal. After things had returned to normal I sat down with my Sudoku book. I opened it up to the page where I’d last been working, and was almost startled to see blood on the page until I remembered where I’d been the last time I used the book. To this day I don’t think I remember anything else about that flight, but I remember the bloody nose adventure.

The Bible recounts multiple instances of the Israelites setting up markers, recounting stories to their children verbally, celebrating feasts, and using pneumonic devices to remember what the Lord had done for them. God set up these circumstances and commanded these reminders so that, in an age without notebooks, plaques, or screens, people would be able to easily remember the Lord’s actions on their behalf.

Although this little reminder of mine pales in comparison to being led out of captivity or being established in a land flowing with milk and honey, I’m nonetheless very grateful for the Lord’s provision for my daughter in a time of need. I wouldn’t even recognize the “tissue woman” if I bumped into her, but I’m glad our paths crossed for a few moments years ago.

Do you have any reminders in your own life of the way God’s moved for your benefit? It could be a scar, a vivid memory, or perhaps some trinket, memento, or photo. The Lord still moves in peoples’ lives today, and it’s good to remember His involvement in your life. Keep that in mind as you face new challenges in your daily living.

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I Know They’re Trying Hard. It’s Just…(sigh)

Years ago my two oldest kids were on a tee-ball team together. For those that aren’t familiar, tee-ball is the version of baseball little kids play before they have the skills to play actual baseball. Instead of pitching the ball to a kid, the ball sits on something that looks like a big golf tee, so the kids get to swing at a ball that isn’t moving. In the unlikely event that the fielding team is competent enough to get three outs in an inning, the batting team keeps batting until everyone on the team has had a chance to hit. Everybody gets to field the ball, and everybody gets to run the bases.

I’ll be the first to admit that tee ball is a good way to teach young kids the mechanics and basics of baseball. I’ll also tell you that it’s extremely painful to watch. You normally have nine or 10 kids out in the field, and when a batter connects with the ball, at least half of them start running toward the ball, no matter what position they’re playing. You also have kids standing around looking up at the clouds, singing songs to themselves, picking their nose, or sitting down in the outfield playing with dandelions. Usually those kids are the ones the ball gets hit to.

I remember the coach for my kids’ team also had a kid on the team. He was funny to watch. He was fine for a while during each game, but there would come a time when he would just be done with it all. He’d take off his sunglasses, hold them straight out in front of him, and just drop them on the ground and walk away, as though it was a mic drop.

Well as enjoyable as the game was to watch, we also had a very young third child, and she would only stay content in the stroller for so long. Since my wife is a better fan and cheerleader than I am, she stayed and cheered for the team while I picked up our youngest when she got too antsy, and I’d take her for a walk around the area.

On one occasion I took her out to a nearby area that had a large storm drain. I held her little hands and helped her walk around on the grass, but then another kid came over and stood on top of the storm drain, looking down into it. He seemed very interested in it, kneeling down and peering as far into the tunnel as he could see. He knelt there for a moment, and a smile crossed my face when I heard him shout down into the drain “Ninja Turtles, are you down there?”

Kids are fun, man. They’ve got big imaginations, they haven’t yet been beaten down by life, and in their minds, anything is possible. The summer months can be a little challenging if you’ve got kids with lots of energy and no school to attend, but hang in there. Love on ‘em anyway, because they don’t stay little for long. Foster that imagination of theirs, and it’ll serve them well as they get older.

And if you’ve got somebody in tee-ball right now, it won’t always be so painful to watch.

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Of Course THAT’S When She Walked Through the Door!

Years ago I found myself bringing my toddler son out in our backyard to give him a change of scenery. He was a curious little guy, and sometimes even just bringing him to a different room or out in the backyard kept him busy for a little while.

Our yard at the time was very small, but it had plenty of stuff for my little guy to explore. It was fenced in, had an HVAC condenser unit, a shed, and a little sandbox. There was always something to clean up back there, so I busied myself doing that while my son set about exploring his environment.

I think I noticed a strange look on his face right around the same time my wife came outside to join us. Having “Mom Radar,” she spotted his expression right away and hurried over to him and opened up his mouth. To her disgust, my son had picked up a little Roly-Poly (a pillbug) and put it in his mouth. She fished it out while half laughing and half scolding her husband. If only she were married to someone responsible, he could be trusted to care for the well being of this little boy out in the backyard!

Man, I blew it. Daddy fail. There are other fails, but this is probably one of the more mild ones. I still have the teenage years ahead of me, so I’m probably going to blow it on multiple occasions when the stakes are higher.

This Sunday is Father’s Day. Everyone out there has a father. Maybe you have a fabulous relationship with your dad. You may have had a terrible father. You may not have ever met your dad. Whatever the case may be, I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that if he hasn’t already, your dad is probably going to let you down at least once (I’m certainly no exception). Even if he loves you, he’s human, and humans make lots of mistakes. (It’s not a dig at you, Dad!)

I can also guarantee you, though, that not only does your Heavenly Father love you, but He does NOT make mistakes. He loves you enough to rebuke you, to discipline you, and to steer you in the direction He wants you to go in, even if it’s not the direction you’re trying to go. Whereas I try to let my kids be kids and encourage them in some of their interests without knowing what they’ll someday become, the Lord controls different aspects of your life to get you to arrive exactly where He wants you to be, right when He wants you to be there, with the right experience already under your belt.

Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. –Proverbs 19:21

“And I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to Me,” Says the Lord Almighty. -2 Corinthians 6:18

Happy Father’s Day to the dads out there!

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What can Christians Learn From Pee Wee Basketball?

Ever see a youth basketball game? If you’re a competitive parent (or even just a parent that enjoys watching a team play as a well-oiled machine), it can be excruciating to watch.

Two of my kids played in a local league this spring. It was their first year playing, and they only practiced once a week. In a case like this it’s important to temper expectations, because they’re not gonna become professional-caliber players over the course of a single season, especially if they’re only practicing once a week.

The games early in the season were somewhere between comical and horrendous. For kids that haven’t played before, or who don’t have much experience, the first few games are for becoming familiar with the rules and the mechanics of the game. “This is how you start a game,” “put your hands up when defending,” “this is what you do during foul shots,” “this is how you set up your defense.” They all get better over time, of course, but early in the season, things are just ugly.

One girl on the team got so excited when she got the ball, she just started running down the court with it rugby style, forgetting to dribble. I saw one boy so focused on getting to his defensive zone that he didn’t pay any attention to the fact that he was clearing the way to the basket for someone on the opposite team, who was dribbling down the court right behind him. One kid can dribble like a fiend with his right hand; he dribbles circles around the opposition, but it’s because he can’t dribble back the other direction. Then there’s the kid that’s super fast. He gets the ball and sprints down the court on a fast break, but he doesn’t look up. By the time he realizes he should slow down to take a shot, it’s already too late and the ball gets away from him, flying out of bounds and thus into the hands of the other team.

It’s been interesting to observe how the officiating has changed over the course of the season. Early on when things were just dog-ugly, the referees were pretty lenient. There were lots of “teachable moments” that occurred, but you’d have to do something pretty egregious to get the whistle blown. Double dribbles, travels, over-the-back fouls…the refs let them get away with stuff in the beginning because the kids were still learning a lot about how this whole thing worked. As the weeks went on, the officiating got a little tighter because the kids got enough experience to be able to know better. “Oh that’s right, I can’t do that. I’ll have to play cleaner next time.” Over the course of a season, there’s a vast improvement from the first week to the final week. Even a small amount of consistent practice and playing according to instruction helps the players become much more proficient.

Superimpose this metaphor on the Christian life. Early in our walk with God, there are probably times He feels just like a coach of a youth basketball team as one of his players dribbles the ball in the wrong direction and takes a shot at the wrong basket. Even if that player is terrible at what they’re doing, they can improve by leaps and bounds if they’re willing to be shaped and molded and to follow the coach’s instructions. Same thing with Christians. In the long run, a kid with mediocre talent and a willingness to be shaped will be more valuable than a kid with a lot of talent and a stubborn resistance to the coach’s instructions or strategy. With dedication and time the kid will mature and have a greater awareness of what’s happening on the court, and as they develop more skills they’ll have more opportunities to make a positive impact for their team. Same deal for those that follow Jesus.

Wherever you are in this metaphor’s spectrum, don’t rob yourself of the opportunity to be shaped and get better. Our coach is willing to work with you one on one to get you thinking more like Him, to work on your weak spots, and to get you doing drills that will prepare you for the next challenge. Spend time with Him, preferably way more than once a week, and you’ll probably notice yourself developing more awareness of how events are unfolding around you and a greater capacity to help your team out. You’ve got some talent in raw form; let’s see what happens when Coach guides you to where He wants you to be.

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The Time Will Soon be Past

Every year in early November, our church does a harvest/fall festival. Kids are encouraged to wear their Halloween costumes and there are a lot of games and opportunities for kids that are elementary age and younger to win candy. It’s a community outreach that brings a lot of families onto the church grounds, and it’s usually a lot of fun for the kiddos.

One of the recurring attractions is a giant inflatable obstacle course. It’s set up so that two people can go head-to-head through tunnels, barriers, walls, and some other weird stuff. All three of my kids have done this, and I think I accompanied each of them on their first time through.

The girls each thought it was okay, and they still go on it most years, but my son is the one that wants to take on his old man each year. He’ll wait in line for a long time to make sure he gets a shot. When he was little, I’d hang back as we were going through the course and make sure he got past a certain set of obstacles before clearing it myself. As the years went by, I’d have to hang back a little less each time. Now I’m not hanging back at all. Once we start, it’s an all-out dash to the end. I’m vaulting over stuff, bouncing off the walls, and leaping up as high as I can on walls to keep up with him.

The final challenge on the course is always climbing up a steep hill and then sliding down the other side. The last time we raced on the obstacle course, we arrived at the last challenge at the same time and started scrambling up the wall. We got to the top at the same time, but when he hesitated to swing his feet around in front of him for the slide down, I plunged right on through, going down the slide head first. I hit the finish line having given my best.

I’m pretty sure this was my last year taking the crown. As he gets bigger and faster, I’m getting slower and less flexible. If I win next time (a big “if”), it will likely be because I’m able to have a cleaner run than he does. It’s a fun tradition, but I know my time as obstacle course champion will soon be over.

The Bible compares the Christian life to running a race. First Corinthians 9:24-25 says Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.

For all of us, the race we’re running will one day end. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that you’re no longer in the race simply because you’re no longer able to physically do the things you used to be able to. If you’re still breathing, God’s not done with you and there’s more work for you to do. I encourage, and even plead with you, finish your race strong! When you get to the top of that final obstacle, don’t stop to admire the view or get your legs in front of you; dive headlong with abandon over the peak of the challenge God commissioned you to face.

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“Abba” Ain’t Just a Swedish Pop Group

Last year as part of the effort to escape the oppression of COVID, our family went to the beach for an overnight. We had a lot of fun, got some sunburn, stayed in a hotel for the first time as a family, and ate some treats that we don’t normally have.

This was the first time in a few years that we had been to the beach. My son, 9 at the time, was now big enough to try using a boogie board in the surf. Since he was only 6 years old the previous time we’d been at the beach, he was a big kid now. In fact, he had even stopped calling me “Daddy” by this point. He was all kinds of excited that he had the chance to try out something cool.

Remember what it was like being a kid? When I was young I used to be the one that was rearing to go, but now I’m the slow parent. We stepped off the boardwalk and onto the sand, and he was ready to hit the water. My wife and I, on the other hand, still had to find a spot to set up blankets and umbrellas, then apply sunblock, then blow up whatever inflatable thing we had brought, have a drink of water, etc. Since my son was chomping at the bit to get started before I was ready to join him, I sort of explained what he needed to do in order to get going on the boogie board, and then he took off to give it a try.

He didn’t quite realize that you can’t really boogie board in the water that’s super close to the shoreline, where all the waves kept crashing. Being the enthusiastic guy that he is, he had fun giving it a try, but he wasn’t really able to get going for any significant distance.

After his old man finally got in the water, I gave it a try from some deeper water. I took a few test runs to make sure I was giving him accurate information. I found the technique that was working for me, then tried passing it along to him. In order for him to really get going, he had to come deeper, past the point where the waves were breaking.

He was fine with the idea of coming deeper, but it was tough for someone less than half my weight to do while holding a very buoyant board. As I stood in water that was probably waist deep for me, it was hard to watch him try to fight through the surf to get out deeper. His first attempt was a victim of poor timing; he ventured into the water at just the right time where the wave hit him while he was off balance. It knocked him down and pushed him back to shore. He got back up and gave it another try, but he tried again too soon. I would have said something to him, but I figured he’d see the next wave coming and hold off until it passed. Nope. The same thing happened and he had to pick himself up again. From where I stood, I could see he was having second thoughts about this. Holding the board made it so much more difficult to get out past the crashing waves when he ordinarily could’ve just dived through them or gone under them.

On the third try, with mounting failures fresh in his memory and fear building in his mind, I watched him enter the water much more tentatively. A wave approached him and it hit his board hard, reminding him of just how powerful the waves could be. I called to him, encouraging him from where I stood, but I could tell he wasn’t going to hang in there a whole lot longer. Moving slowly when he should’ve moved quickly, more waves bullied him. Struggling to keep a straight face, his eyes grew wide and he called out to me in fear, “Daddy, I don’t like this!”

It was a heart-wrenching moment. I moved quickly to him and helped get him steady. While still standing in the zone where the waves crashed, I told him I could help him get past the crazy part, but he was no longer willing to give it a try, he just wanted to get out of there as fast as possible. It pained me to see him give up, and I tried several more times to convince him to give it another go, but he had made up his mind to stick to the shallows.

The part of that experience that sticks out the most to me was when my little guy’s enthusiasm melted away and he went back to calling me “Daddy.” He gave up on something that I know he would’ve enjoyed if he’d just done things a little differently. I could’ve forced him to do it, but I wanted him to want to do it, and it didn’t seem right to make him try something he no longer wanted to do (especially since it could have resulted in him fearing the ocean for years to come).

In the Bible, God goes by many names. One of them is “Abba.” The word “Abba” is something that Hebrew-speaking children call their fathers…it’s like saying “Daddy.”

The word Abba isn’t used often in the New Testament. It’s only used by two people: Jesus and Paul. Joachim Jeremias, a German theologian, remarked on Jesus’ use of the word. He writes “[Jesus] spoke to God as a child to its father: confidently and securely, and yet at the same time reverently and obediently.”

It makes sense that the Son of God talks to His Father that way. The part that’s crazy and amazing is this verse that Paul writes in Romans 8:15 and following. Paul’s writing about how we’re changed once we receive the Holy Spirit, and he says The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

This means that we (Christians) are adopted into the family of God. Not only that, but we’re loved and accepted to such a high degree that we’re given the privilege of calling God the Father “Daddy!”

The next time you’re overwhelmed or just having a hard time in general, remember that not only can you call on your Heavenly Father…you can call on your Heavenly Daddy. If you tell Him “I don’t like this,” know that He sees you, He’s got you, and He can get you where you need to be.

God, thank you so much for understanding us so well and for giving us so many illustrations by which we can get a better sense of Your love for us. You’ve assured us we’ll have hard times in this life. When we do, remind us to call on You, seek comfort in You, and remember that You’ll give us what we need for each day. Amen.

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Now THAT’S a Scary Congregation

Our church does some fun stuff. This past weekend it organized a Father/Son paintball outing at a paintball facility in the area. I took my son and we spent the day shooting at other guys.

I’m still recovering, and probably will be for a few more days. From the way my body feels, I guess I must’ve spent a lot of time in a crouch or something. Aside from getting hit, my quads scream at me every time I walk downhill or down stairs.

This was my son’s first time paintballing, and he had a good time. We’ve been laser tagging before, but this is simulated combat at another level.

We attend a church in northern Virginia. You know who lives and attends church in northern Virginia? Military dads. You know what military dads teach their kids for fun? Small-unit tactics. I have .68-caliber welts you wouldn’t believe, from both the 40+ crowd and the teenage demographic. One was so deep in my leg that it took a couple of days to start showing. Some of them are places you’d expect, like the chest and the top of the head, but others are in places you wouldn’t really expect, like in the back and ribs (not because I was running away, but because some of the Special Operations members of our congregation out-flanked me and I didn’t even know what was happening until it was too late to avoid the bruises).

For those of you that may not be familiar with paintball, not every paintball that hits you breaks open. If a paintball hits you but doesn’t break, you’re still in the game. There’s something of an honor system in that regard, so it’s easy to get hot under the collar if you think you hit someone but they’re not leaving the field. If they’re not walking off, you usually have to take their word that the paintball hadn’t broken open (and in that case you can keep shooting at them to try to get one to break on them).

No way around it…somebody got me this round

We probably played about a dozen matches that day. The very first one we played, I stuck near my son in the back until he could get a feel for what was happening. As members of our team began getting eliminated, I moved closer to the heavier shooting. Eventually I got shot right in the keister (just a flesh wound!). I put my hand up and covered my barrel, indicating I’d been eliminated, and walked off the field. Only after getting back to the safe zone did I discover that the paintball had not actually burst…I had walked off the field without actually needing to. I eliminated myself! In doing so, I left work undone and I left the team with one fewer member to help out.

There are lots of things in a Christian walk that will sideline people, either temporarily or permanently. Without question, there are things in life that will knock you off your feet and kick you when you’re down. Tragedy, pain, and loss are guarantees. The sad part is when Christians think they should still be sidelined when in reality the power of the Holy Spirit living in them means they’re very capable of doing much more than what they think they’re capable of. Their heads hang low instead of being held high. They live as victims when they should be living victoriously.

As a child of God, you bring something special to this world and to the family of God. If you know what that special something is, but you’re not following through on it, you’re essentially eliminating yourself from the fight. Please, hang in there! You’ve already got everything you need to start doing the work you were put here to do, and if the only reason you haven’t begun is because you haven’t yet chosen to do so, maybe it’s time to get off the sidelines.