Tag: i have to

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When Pushing too Hard can Push Others Away

I like to take different types of personality tests. It’s fascinating to answer a bunch of questions, then get results accurately describing the way I approach life. I’m one thing on the Meyers-Briggs, I’m something else on the Enneagram, and I’m a variety of other things on other tests. It’s always humbling to receive such accurate descriptions of myself from complete strangers, and then realize no matter how detailed those descriptions get, my creator knows me at an even deeper level. He knows not only my strengths and weaknesses and how I deal with conflict, but the failures and victories still ahead of me, how I’ll respond to challenges He knows are coming, and to what degree I’ll rely on Him through it all.

One of the tests I’ve recently taken focuses on the way I communicate with others. I’m what’s known as a “Challenger.” A Challenger transmits courage and awakens calling. That means when I see people, I see greatness inside of them, and I want to both convince them and motivate them to unlock it. If you’ve poked around on the DareGreatlyNow website, in the “about us” section or in past posts, this may not be a surprise.

It saddens me to see people with untapped potential. I want to help people, especially Christians, believe they can achieve the improbable things God’s called them to do with their lives. I want Christ-followers to see they don’t need to sweat all the details, or even have a clear view of the big picture; they just need to do their part, whatever it is, and trust not only that God knows what He’s doing, but also that He’s weaving all the lives and efforts of other believers into a masterpiece to fight evil, save souls, strengthen faith, and glorify Him.

A pitfall for me is being susceptible to always pushing for more, always urging higher and higher levels of dedication or performance, at the cost of failing to stop and celebrate wins. “That was yesterday’s victory, we need new sacrifice to win today’s battle!” I’m in danger of pushing the people I communicate with away, making them think “will I ever be enough for this guy?”

So let’s meet in the middle. Right now I’m talking to my Christian brothers and sisters out there. How has God been at work in your life lately, and what wins in your spiritual life can you celebrate? If you’re trying to establish or improve devotional habits, for example, celebrate a win like “I read the entire passage I was supposed to read for my devotions,” or “I’m still extending my longest streak of daily devotions.” Those are wins, and they should be celebrated.

If you’re trying to get established in a habit or spiritual discipline, let me offer a tactic you might find useful. I’ll use the example of going to the gym, but you can use it for building time spent on devotions, prayer, volunteering, giving to the offering, and any other habit you’re trying to improve. If it’s been a long time since you’ve been to the gym and you’re pretty much starting from scratch, follow this simple rule. For the first week, go every day you’ve decided to go (three days a week, five days a week, etc.), but spend no longer than 5 minutes inside the building. You can walk in, get on a treadmill for 3 minutes, then walk out. Finish week one? Do the same thing for week two. Do it again in week three. What this is doing is helping you master the art of showing up. You’ll get tired of spending more time traveling to and from the gym than actually working out. Once you prove to yourself you can make room in your life for the habit, show yourself you can improve on it. Instead of 3 minutes on the treadmill, do 7, or instead of 3 mph, do 3 and a half. Turn a set of curls into a set of curls and a set of flies. Instead of two laps in the pool, do four. Celebrate those wins as you reach new milestones. While you’re reaching those new milestones, you just might realize you have it within yourself to reach for even higher goals.

In a complete left turn, here’s another way of looking at this. Sometimes artwork speaks to me in a way nothing else does. I came across this picture while looking for music to listen to while writing. More than any other picture of friends embracing, wildlife beside peaceful waters, or a single set of footprints on the beach, this picture challenges me to move toward what I want to be spiritually. We see a soldier, having fulfilled the task he’s been assigned, taking a moment in his exhaustion before rising to his feet. It’s been a long fight, and his strength is practically gone. He’s been fighting so hard for so long he’s got to mentally push himself to even summon the strength to stand. He’s come under fire, he’s probably lost companions, but the equipping he’s received enabled him to perform the feat to which he’s been called. He can’t see the bigger picture, but he doesn’t need to, because he trusts his commander to use him the best way possible. Yes, he’s been intimidated, overwhelmed with fear, and knows there’s no guarantee he’ll see tomorrow, but he knows those are only excuses for not putting forth everything he’s got. By focusing on the things he can control and not worrying about the things he can’t, he can channel all his energy into what he’s been charged with doing.

Though it’s not part of the picture, I imagine a scene taking place later, when this same soldier kneels before his ruler, having brought honor to him through his obedience, faithfulness, and tenacity. Receiving a hand on his shoulder and a joyful “well done” from the figure he wants most in his life to honor would bring him to tears.

It’s a metaphor of the way I want my life to look when it reaches its end, and it’s what I want to urge you toward in your own life. What strength are you holding back and not committing to your calling? Is there a tough choice you’ve been avoiding, because you know it will cost you something you’ve so far been unwilling to give? Celebrate the wins in your spiritual life, but don’t ever think “this is it. This is as high as I can go. God can’t use me any more than He already has.” The path to your greatest potential might just lie through your greatest fear.

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A Little Taste of That Next Level

It’s probably been almost 20 years since I last jumped out of an airplane, but there are still some fun memories of those days. Most of the skydiving you see in pictures or videos is called “belly flying,” where the skydiver is laying down horizontally. It’s a lot of fun, I did a lot of neat stuff that way. You fall about 120 mph, and you can flip, roll, do formations, all kinds of neat stuff.

But there was a brief time in this chapter of my life I wanted to try something a little more edgy. Rather than belly flying, it’s possible to do something called “sit flying” or “head-down flying,” where you position yourself vertically instead of horizontally. It’s trickier to do and takes some additional practice. You can do it right-side up (so you look like you’re standing in the air) or upside-down. Since you’re positioned vertically rather than horizontally, there’s less drag and you have a faster terminal velocity. Instead of 120 mph, you’re falling closer to 150 or 180 mph. Unfortunately it means the freefall is over sooner, but the tradeoff is faster speeds allow you to have more precise control once you become proficient at it.

I only tried this for a handful of jumps. I jumped with a coach, who stayed belly-flying until I managed to get into a vertical orientation. It was tough to do, I had a lot of stutter-starts, and it was a totally different animal than the skydiving I was used to. For a bit, I got the balance right and I started accelerating toward the ground, away from my coach. She was very experienced, so she caught up to me once I got away from her. The thing that felt really weird was when I managed to hold the right position for awhile, I started going so fast my goggles began wobbling from the wind. I was on the cusp of starting to get this totally new thing figured out when I, for whatever reason, couldn’t hold the position any longer, and I tumbled out of the vertical orientation and my body acted like an air brake and slowed me down by 30+ mph (can you imagine?). I got a little taste of that “next level” feeling, and I couldn’t hang on.

We’ll come back to this in a minute, but first I’d like to talk for just a bit about the different aspects of various ministries that excite us.

God created all of us with various interests. Even unbelievers have different hobbies they enjoy. Why? Why does someone get into stamp collecting while someone else crochets or enjoys woodworking, gardening, or painting? (Or skydiving?) None of it’s right or wrong; it’s just how God wired us as individuals. For those of us who become Christians, there’s a similar phenomenon at play. Upon being saved, many develop a desire to serve the body of Christ in some capacity, but there’s no cookie-cutter approach to how to go about doing it. We’re drawn to one or more of myriad possibilities.

Think about the different volunteer opportunities available in church. A few which come to mind are greeters, playing instruments, being an usher, singing, being a Sunday school teacher or working on the audio/visual team. That’s just in your local body of believers; beyond those walls you can volunteer in soup kitchens, hospitals, meal delivery organizations, do things like yard work for folks who can’t do that sort of thing anymore, etc. In broader terms, there are those attracted to ministry roles which care for the hurting, which help give rest to the weary, or which train Christians for something grander. There are others, limited only by God’s imagination. What type of ministry sparks your interest? If you had to donate personal time and effort to helping others in some capacity, what would you choose to allocate it toward?

For me, my particular ministry area of interest is seeing the sparks fly when people step out of their status quo lives and into the unknown, knowing only that they’ve been called to move out in faith in a particular direction. I love seeing when people recognize and then step into the role they were made for, when they start down the road of becoming who they were meant to be. It’s that moment when faith overflows into action, like Noah gathering his family around and saying “we’re building a boat.” It’s a shepherd boy saying “I’ll fight him.” It’s those “goosebump” moments in the Christian walk.

Sadly, many readers of the Bible seem to think the God of the Old Testament no longer empowers His followers today. This world is full of Christians living lives far below their potential, and I want to be a part of a ministry that encourages them to step into the role God has waiting for them. That’s why I write. If they just took that next step into whatever it is they know they’re called toward, they just might have a sit-flying experience, where their goggles start shimmying, their eyes go wide, and it takes their breath away to get a taste of the world that awaits them.

At some time or another, at least one person from all but a handful of the world’s nations has stopped in to visit this blog. Some had to circumvent firewalls to do it, others stumbled across it despite it being one blog among thousands. Of the believers among all those visitors, imagine all the backgrounds, cultures, and scenarios that exist. All of them are called to live lives honoring the Lord, and the way they do that is different for each person. What would the world look like if they all pursued God’s calling for their lives, even if they didn’t fully understand what it looked like?

Is there something tugging at your mind or heart, something God’s burdened you with, that you can’t shake? It might just be Him saying “come on, I’ve got a job for you.” Take a deep breath, pray for clarity, strength, courage, and commitment, and move out on what you know to be God’s will for your life.

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We’ll Never Know the Cost of Saying No

I’ve written previously about God placing certain ideas or desires on people’s hearts. It’s usually manifested as a sort of supernatural notion, it’s an unexplainable sense of “I can’t explain it, but I’m supposed to do this thing.” Anything from “I’m supposed to stop and talk to that stranger” to “I’m supposed to give that person some money” to “I think God wants me to start a new business,” or any number of other possibilities. I’ve referred to it in the past as “God’s nudge.”

I can remember one time as a kid, I received one of these nudges. It was probably my first one. I can’t remember what it was, but I clearly remember that I ignored it. Whatever I felt like I was being prompted to do, I thought “No, that doesn’t make sense. Why would I do that? That’s ridiculous.” I wish I could remember what it was, but whatever it ended up being, the action that was supposed to be taken…didn’t get taken (at least by me).

I’ve also written before that God doesn’t need us to be a part of fulfilling His plan, but He invites us to be a part of it. This is one case where I refused the invitation. As a result, I missed out on something, and this side of Heaven I won’t ever know what it was. It may have been something limited to that day, right then and there, or it might have been on a grander scale, setting back a lifestyle of “saying yes to God” (and the corresponding level of positively impacting the world) by a period of years. I essentially told the Holy Spirit to buzz off. As you might imagine, that has its downsides; I couldn’t tell you how long it was after that before I received the next nudge.

This probably isn’t a commonly discussed concept, but every Christ-follower has a certain number of these nudges they’ll receive between the time they accept Christ and the time He calls them home. It’s not a one-size-fits-all approach, I imagine there’s quite a bit of variation from believer to believer. Like me, I’m sure many people have declined to accept a nudge at least once. It’s impossible to know what we’re forfeiting by not taking part. Here’s how I see it though. One of your goals as a believer, from here on out, should be to respond positively to 100% of the remaining “nudges” you get from God. I don’t have any idea how many that means; you could be shooting for one out of one, 50 out of 50, or 1021 out of 1021. The goal is 100%.

Think of that 100% fraction, whatever the size of the denominator, as being “full.” Then, looking through that lens, see if the two parts in the second half of this verse hit you any differently:

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. –John 10:10

Instead of “full,” many translations say “abundantly.” Not only does Christ come so we can have life, but so that we can have it abundantly. I believe the abundance, the fullness, discussed here goes hand-in-hand with those nudges and our response to them.

I started this blog as a result of a nudge God gave me. I’ll be the first to admit not every post is great. Some of them are just plain mediocre. As I look back over time, though, I see how God can use simple persistence and faithfulness in a fallen human to build something bigger than I once thought I would. I started posting in the Fall of 2018. It’s now been a little over five years, and this is my 300th post.

I don’t have a massive readership. Most of the people that subscribe are family, friends, or friends of family. I can tell you this, though. People from all over the world somehow stumble across the blog. I don’t see any details about who they are, all I see is that someone from country X clicked on post Y. The part about that that’s really cool for me, as an introvert who gets drained talking to people, is that I’m advancing ideas that come from God, not only to people I’ll never meet in person, but it’s happening while I’m sleeping, while I’m at work, while I’m on vacation, and when my thoughts are far away from blogging. When God gives a nudge, don’t worry about outcome. Worry about obedience. Obedience is your responsibility, and outcome is God’s responsibility. There are now 300 different posts that God can lead people to, and He can bring them to just the right one, exactly when they need to find it.

Probably in the early part of next month, I’ll fill you in on some of the insights about the blog’s readership for the year 2023. My intent is not to brag, but to show how a guy with no particularly relevant credentials, demonstrating only faithful obedience to God’s calling using the talents God’s entrusted to him, creates opportunities to reach and encourage people that he would have never had a chance of influencing before. I want to help give you the confidence to follow the nudges YOU receive. God has invited me to take part in His story, and it’s humbling to start to see how, years later, He uses my acceptance of His invitation to enable me to live my own life more abundantly. My intent is to show you for the sake of encouraging you, too, to accept His invitation. He doesn’t need us on the journey, but He wants us to come along. What better way to live our lives than in a way that brings Him glory?

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Overcoming Yourself and Fulfilling Your Purpose

People are fantastic at talking themselves out of things.

Did you ever just kind of “know” that you were supposed to take a certain action that had no other origin other than the Holy Spirit moving you to do it? Maybe it was to give some cash to someone you didn’t know. Maybe it was to connect and have a conversation with someone you hadn’t spoken with in a long time. It could’ve just been to speak up at a certain time.

But you didn’t do it.

Ever have a moment like that? Afterwards, you can brush it away, saying “It’s fine, that wouldn’t have made any sense.” On the other hand, maybe you actually resolved to do it. “You know what? No, that doesn’t make sense, but I just feel like I’m supposed to.” Then you never really got around to following through.

I’m curious; for every time God prompts a person to do something that they then follow through on, I’m a little scared to know how many prompts go ignored or are rationalized away.

When God does big things, He invites people to come along with Him; the people that go along and get to be a part of those events usually aren’t the people that say “no.” Sure, there are some “Jonahs” thrown into the mix, but by and large, God wants willing participants. You’ve heard the clichés. “If you want to walk on water, you’ve got to get out of the boat.” You know in your mind that God has an infinite number of ways to unlock your potential, but you struggle with giving up control and actually allowing Him to do it.

I get it. Really, I do.

Don’t let the story end there, though. Just because you struggle with something doesn’t mean it’s not worth the struggle. A step of faith, plus another step of faith, followed by additional steps of faith leads to walking by faith.

There’s a term in physics called “inertia.” You’ve probably heard it expressed as one of the famous laws of motion: a body at rest tends to stay at rest, and a body in motion tends to stay in motion, unless acted upon by an outside force. Whatever your life’s trajectory, when God sets something new in your path, He’s presenting you with a task that’s going to require a change in inertia. Being aware of your shortcomings and taking actions intended to combat your weaknesses can help build the momentum you need to overcome your existing inertia.

An example would probably help. When I feel God’s leading to pursue a course of action, my natural tendency is to stew on it for a bit and let the idea grow on me. “Let me sleep on it” is a common mantra in my life. That can be very helpful if I’m thinking about refinancing a mortgage, but it can be a bad thing if it’s following a calling from God. With time the idea fades or the window passes. There are times I’m reluctant to pursue something, but I know I really need to do it anyway. In my case, as a way of holding myself accountable, I tell someone about the idea. I’ve found that if the idea spreads to someone else, it has a tougher time dying. The person or people that know about it can ask me how it’s going. They can hold my feet to the fire, even if they’re just curious about whether or not I was even serious about it. God can use me to do things for His glory, but I have to be willing to make an effort…to take steps to fight through the distractions, to withstand all the other things that compete for my time, attention, and energy. In that fight, I can be my own worst enemy, so I have to take additional measures to move toward that goal.

Let me drill down a bit further, hoping it helps you in your own Christian walk.

I absolutely love it when God uses people that are “unqualified” to accomplish big tasks. David killed Goliath. Moses, at age 80, with a speech impediment, became the voice of God’s people. Jesus gathered 12 “nobodies” and changed the world. These are well-known Bible stories, but these things still happen today. God calls people to do big things that don’t make sense on paper, and He brings them success in order to showcase that it could only have happened through His intervention.

A little about me for those that don’t know me well. I’m very left-brained. My mind naturally gravitates toward math, science, logic, analysis, organization…all the things that are boring or cold for right-brained people, who favor imagination, intuition, the arts, and creativity. Now…I have some of those right-brained qualities, but my natural thought processes lean more toward a left-brained style.

So imagine my surprise when discovering that I feel led to write a fiction book. This is honestly a project that I feel God has laid before me.

That makes no sense, right? If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time you might say “well, he already does a lot of writing, so that’s not really a stretch.” It’s true, I do a lot of writing for DareGreatlyNow.com, but almost none of it is fiction. I have no training in creative writing (or in whatever style blogging is considered, either). These entries are usually only two pages or so, and they’re not difficult to write about because most of them are either my experiences or they come right out of the Bible. I’m talking about a book that’s like, 40,000-50,000 words. The word that keeps coming back to me is unqualified.

Still, if you work at it for a long time, you could probably make that goal happen once, even if it’s difficult. Seemingly to make it apparent that God’s involved and that His strength is made perfect in my weakness, I feel led to write not one fiction book, but a series. Not just a trilogy. This is a seven-part series of books that are about 40,000-50,000 words each. That’s like starting with a blank piece of paper and ending up with The Chronicles of Narnia. Not just The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe…I’m talking even the ones you don’t remember or never heard of. (How many of you are now trying to see if you can name all the books in the series, I wonder?)

Alright, so let’s say I get past the nagging “unqualified” lens. The next word I deal with is “daunting.”

That’s absolutely an overwhelming task. I don’t have the time or the drive to do that! Here’s the thing though: if your vision of a God-initiated project in your life isn’t scaring you at least a little bit, you may not be envisioning something big enough. When God commissions you to do something, He also empowers and equips you to do it. Additional requirements that will need to be in place in order for your endeavor to succeed will be set in motion at the appropriate time. He’s not going to leave you flapping in the wind. As you start taking steps to make it happen (I have a colleague who might say “as you start taking bites of that elephant”), He sustains you and gives you what you need to move ever closer to the goal. By the time it’s over, it becomes evident that it could only have happened with His help.

Well there you have it, I’ve shared with you something that I feel led to pursue. Now I’m on the hook for it. I don’t really have a whole lot of experience with estimating how long this should take, but I’m guessing I’m signing up for something that will likely take the better part of a decade, unless I can somehow quit my job to work on it full time, but, you know, still have money for food, shelter, and all those other things my family’s grown accustomed to.

That’s me; that’s what I’m working with. I said in last week’s post that I’d have more on what God is asking of you. Odds are that you’ve been spending a lot more time at home over the past 10 months or so. That much time can drive a person crazy, but it can also provide opportunities for quieting yourself to hear what God would tell you.

I’m going to show you a less-than-3-minute video that I’ve shown you before, but a lot has changed in the world since the last time I did. It’s an advertisement for a product, but that’s not why I’m showing it to you. I don’t have any financial interest in the video or what it’s advertising. In fact, I haven’t even looked too far into what the video’s selling. I just think it’s a phenomenal video because it articulates a feeling I’ve experienced, so it hits home a little more than normal. I’m hoping that it helps provide some clarity for you, and maybe help you make sense of a restlessness that’s been pulling at the fringes of your mind.

After watching this video, if you have a picture in your mind (anywhere between super fuzzy or remarkably concrete) of what it’s talking about, I encourage you to do what I did in this post: know yourself enough to take some actions that will help you overcome the inertia that would otherwise keep you from following through. If you need to tell someone, tell them. If you need someone to tell but can’t get past how crazy you think it sounds, email me: tim@daregreatlynow.com. If God lays something on your heart, please pursue it. Think of it as the next “step of faith” in your journey toward “walking by faith.”

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You’re the Key

Those are all keys behind him

When I was really young, my dad was a maintenance guy at a Christian conference center in eastern Pennsylvania, and our family lived on the campus. Groups of people from churches in New York, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania would come and attend retreats at this place. Once the groups departed, somebody had to walk around to all the rooms that had just been vacated, and make sure all the lights were turned off and the heat/air conditioning weren’t blasting in a vacant room. Sometimes that duty fell to my dad, and every once in awhile he’d take me along.

As a part of the maintenance staff, Dad had a key ring that was chock full of keys that opened just about anything and everything on the whole complex. It could be a master key for all the guest rooms in a given building, the key to the room in the gymnasium where they kept all the spare basketballs, the padlock to the room in the basement of the snack shack where they kept a bunch of electronics and motors, or a little key to adjust the thermostat in the meeting rooms. If you needed to open a lock anywhere on the campus, there’s a good chance my dad’s key ring had a solution.

As a kid, it was impossible to keep track of the differences between all the keys. A few of them stood out from the others; maybe some were shinier, bigger, or the head had a distinct shape or color. To me, though, most of them were indistinguishable from one another. If someone plunked me down in front of a random locked door somewhere on the campus with that key ring, it would’ve taken a good deal of time by trial and error for me to open it. Dad knew what each one did, though.

Now imagine that every Christian is a key on God’s giant key ring. There’s a door, or maybe a group of doors, that you have the ability to unlock (or lock). It’s your purpose; it’s what you were made for. You can be jealous of what other keys were built for, but it sure isn’t going to help you fulfill your role any better. You might even try to function in a lock you weren’t designed to operate, but it’s not what you were made for. Some people are dissatisfied or in denial about the lock in which they fit, and they want to choose their own lock.

Sorry Pardner, it doesn’t work that way.

There’s a lock out there for which you are the key, and you might encounter your lock during this unique time in history. The Man holding the key ring wants to use you according to His schedule, but if you’re unwilling or are too focused on a lock for which you’re not the key, you’re missing your calling. My request to you would be: work the lock you’re built for.

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Planned Obsolescence

Ever notice how you can say “they just don’t make it like they used to” about a lot of things?

For example, my parents have a clothes dryer that’s older than me. It’s complained a bit every now and then, but the thing is built like a tank and is still going after a few fixes. Modern ones seem to break if you look at them the wrong way.

Newer cars seem to fall apart much easier than the ones from, say, 30 years ago. What used to be fixed by a good hit with a ball peen hammer now requires more genteel computer diagnostics to figure anything out before you can start to make repairs.

I don’t know if this is true or not, but I heard that back in the 1940s and 50s, women’s pantyhose was of such high quality that the manufacturers worried they weren’t selling enough to sustain their businesses. Their product was so good that after a woman bought some, she didn’t need any more for a long time.

Enter the idea of planned obsolescence, or the intentional use of lower quality materials and construction to shorten the lifespan of a product in an effort to induce consumers to buy more of them. If it falls apart sooner, you’ll end up buying more units than you otherwise would have.

Here’s an odd thought: what if we are the lower-quality product? In 2017 the average life expectancy for Americans was 78.54 years. By comparison, at that point in Moses’ life, he hadn’t even stood before Pharaoh yet. Abraham didn’t have his first child until he was 86, and then he lived about 90 years beyond that. Noah was over 500 years old when he started building the ark, was 600 when the flood started, and he lived another 350 years beyond that until he was 950 years old! This was before antibiotics, nutritional supplements, and the medical knowledge we enjoy today. My friends, you and I are some of the best examples of planned obsolescence I can think of.

Even great figures of Biblical history are shuffled off the stage of God’s theater. Consider King David. Though flawed, he was one of the most genuine and passionate characters in the whole Bible. He’s the stuff legends are made of; as a youngster he vanquished a giant professional soldier with a sling and a rock, then went on to lead raids of enemy camps with ragtag mercenaries as his companions. Although defined as a man of war, his zeal for the Lord led him to set the stage for Solomon’s construction of the Temple by collecting an unbelievable amount of precious metals and other materials. Jesus came from the line of David, for goodness’ sake! At the end of his life, he was unquestionably recognized as a giant of the Faith. Yet even he was just a man, and was intended to play a small role in God’s overall plan. In spite of all his accomplishments, listen to how David is described in Acts 13:36:

“Now when David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep; he was buried with his ancestors and his body decayed.”

“Falling asleep” in the Bible is usually a euphemism for dying. That’s not the interesting thing though. There are a few different things we can take from this verse, but the two I want to focus on are 1. that he served God’s purpose “in his own generation,” and 2. when he had fulfilled God’s reason for putting him here on Earth, he moved on into eternity.

To the first point, can you imagine if you lived during a different time period? You could have lived 4,000 years ago, or you could have been placed on hold and not made your debut here on Earth for another 200 years. God put you in the here and now intentionally. You are a part of “your generation” because you are to fulfill God’s purpose within it. I don’t know what that purpose is and you might not either, but the fact that you’re reading this right now, today, means you probably weren’t born before 1940 or so. The “today” you see is not an accident or a random assignment, you belong here.

To the second point, you’re here on Earth to do whatever God put you here to do, and you might not be going anywhere until you do it. At some point after that He’ll escort you from this life, but it could be seconds or decades between when you “complete your mission” and you make your departure. To throw a curveball at the situation: almost none of us know with full certainty what our specific purpose is or when we’ll accomplish it.

Zooming back out to the big picture and our limited time on Earth, it seems we might be a little bit more like an aging toaster than we care to admit. We can tell when things are getting toward the end, but most of us can’t predict when we’re toasting our last bagel.

What are we to do then? I’ll summarize it as best I can:

Love God ferociously and use the talents, resources, and circumstances He’s matched you up with to make a positive difference in people’s lives, all the while giving the glory to Him. You will fall, you will have self doubts, and in many cases you will fail. There may be more bad days than good days, but you have been placed here, at this exact point in history, to make an eternal difference in some way.

There’s a song we’ve all heard a million times; it’s one we usually hear in December, but its message fits with the core of this post. If you were meeting the newborn King of Kings, and you simply couldn’t compete with the expensive gifts that others brought, one of the best things you could do is use the talents He’s given you to make Him smile. Isn’t that what we’re all after? (There’s a fun version of this song below.)  

Do your best to serve God’s purpose in your generation.

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Outside That Door There’s a 10,000-foot Drop

This is my hair BEFORE skydiving…

Once I finished college, I didn’t do anything related to my academic major. I needed a job, but didn’t have anything professional in mind, so I moved back in with Mom and Dad and worked construction.

Since I had worked construction the past few summers, nothing felt different initially. Doing the job as a college grad didn’t feel any different than doing the job the previous summer. It didn’t really seem strange until the end of the summer, when I ordinarily would have prepared to head back to school. To help mark the occasion of our entry into the “real world,” a college buddy and I decided to go skydiving.

We made some reservations, then showed up at the airport one Saturday morning early in September. We signed the waivers, took the short class, then waited our turn.

We signed up for tandem jumps. That’s where you’re connected to an experienced jumper that’s trained to do two-person jumps. You don’t have to focus on any of the flight plan, what your altitude is, etc. All you have to do is go along for the ride and enjoy yourself. My tandem instructor was Frank. He took us over to the tiny plane we’d use and walked us through the steps we’d later take when exiting the aircraft. After that we squeezed into the plane, took off, and started the climb to 10,000 feet.

(I paid extra to have my jump recorded, so there was a jumper with a camera and video camera on her helmet that went along. Unfortunately I don’t have a digital copy; it’s still on VHS format, so I can’t show it here. I can share some of the pictures though.)

There were six jumpers and a pilot crammed into a little Cessna. As we reached 3,000 feet, the door opened and one of the guys jumped out. I’m not sure if I was aware of this at the time or not, but it turns out this man was Don Kellner, who was (and still is) the world record holder for the number of sport parachute jumps. At the time, he had about 30,000 jumps or something ridiculous like that. In order to set and build on his record, he’d be on just about every plane that went up, and most of the time he’d hop out around 3,000 feet. He’d skip the freefall and deploy his parachute right away. They called this type of jump a “hop ‘n pop.” I didn’t see it coming, so all I knew was that the door blew open without warning and a guy fell out.

The rest of the climb to altitude was uneventful. It was my buddy and I, our two tandem instructors, and a videographer. They kept the mood light by making plenty of jokes, so that we’d stay loose and not seize up when the door opened and we stuck our heads outside the plane and looked down.

The time finally arrived. We shuffled around inside the plane to get connected to the instructors. We went over a few last-minute things, gave a final thumbs-up, and then they opened the door.

Inside the plane it got windy and much cooler than it had been on the ground. We inched up to the doorway, and the videographer actually climbed outside the plane and hung from the wing strut while she waited for us to exit. Frank shouted in my ear, I did what he had showed me on the ground earlier, and out the door we went.

This is the only part that feels like you’re falling

There’s really not a good way to convey what it’s like to freefall. It’s unlike anything else. There was only a brief fraction of a second where there was any falling sensation, and that was as you fell out of the plane. The ground didn’t seem like it was rushing up at me at all. It was just windy, loud, and amazing. You can judge for yourself just how miserable I was.

We fell for about 30 seconds, reaching a max speed of around 120 mph. It didn’t feel that fast, because there were no references other than people falling at the same speed (it’s not like you fell past a bird or a hot air balloon at 120 mph, for example). It was smooth. The video shows that Frank and I did some goofy stuff and made weird faces (imagine what kind of silly stuff you’d do if someone pointed a leaf blower at your face). Then Frank deployed the main chute, and after the rapid deceleration the loud rush of air gave way to a gentle breeze and relative silence as we slowed down to about 20 mph. He then gave me an aerial tour of the surrounding area as we continued our descent. Five minutes later we were safely on the ground, and I was ready to do it all again.

I fell over a mile and a half straight down and lived to tell the tale

I was hooked. Eventually I went back and did it again, and I’ll share more skydiving stories in the future, but for now here’s what’s important. When you jump out of a plane, there’s no doing it halfway. There’s no way to stay in the plane and at the same time experience what it’s like to leave it midair. You either leave the plane or you don’t, and the two outcomes are vastly different.

Despite what many people seem to think, access to Heaven is based on an either/or criterion: you either have a saving relationship with Jesus Christ, or you don’t. Here too, the two outcomes are vastly different. If you don’t have that relationship, you’re not going to get into Heaven.

“That’s incredibly intolerant!” It’s okay to think that, because it is. I serve an intolerant God. For some reason that seems to shock people. God doesn’t tolerate our antics and rationalizations.  I can’t really blame Him. Why should He? Imagine you had a child that wanted nothing to do with you, yet demanded all the benefits of being associated with you. On top of that, they replace you with someone else and still want the rights and privileges of being your child. How tolerant would you be?

These days there seems to be very little in terms of pure black and white. Just because the world looks at things with a “everything is relative” mindset however, doesn’t make it true or mean we get to water down God’s truth. There ARE absolutes. One of them is that the only way to Heaven is through Jesus Christ.

People will decry this view as having a lack of inclusivity. I’d counter that Christ was one of the most inclusive historical figures ever. He went out of His way to reach the dregs of society; He violated cultural norms by empowering and addressing women directly; and He advocated for fair treatment of foreigners.

The difference is that Christ wanted all people to hear the truth so they could make their own decision. He wanted everybody to have access to this information regardless of their background or standing. What they did with it was entirely up to them, but He wanted everyone in the world to know that the only way to God (and Heaven) was through Him.

You either have that saving relationship or you don’t. There’s no doing it halfway, and there’s no middle ground. The good…no…the great news is that you’re welcome to start that saving relationship right now. Even if you think you’re beyond saving or that you’ve done things that are too terrible to be forgiven, He won’t turn you away.

Maybe you’ve never prayed before, but if you’re open to this, pray this prayer along with me:

Dear Jesus…thank you so much for loving me even when I don’t deserve you at all. Lord, come into my life, change me, break me, make me new, make me whole…forgive me. Purify my heart. Jesus I believe you died on the cross and rose again three days later. You are my savior and one day I will live with You forever. But meanwhile, help me to stand for you. To shine for you, to make a difference and let your truth be known. Use me Lord, Holy Spirit fill me to overflowing. I love you so much! In Jesus’ name, amen.

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Can You Ever “Safely” Jump Off A Cliff?

When I was a kid I loved climbing stuff. That held true as I got older, but I also found out that if you have the right equipment, it could be a lot more fun coming down.

This is how I got interested in rappelling. I don’t remember how I got started with it, probably on a youth group trip to a climbing gym or something. I started thinking it over, and as I got into my teens, I began purchasing bits of gear here and there. That stuff’s not cheap. I was afraid my parents were going to give me a hard time for wasting my money on some bone-headed hobby, so I kept it hidden for awhile.

It’s only by God’s grace that I didn’t break my neck or otherwise seriously hurt myself. I didn’t know what I was doing. At first I was so eager to try the stuff out that I’d climb a tree in my backyard while Mom and Dad were both at work. I’d tie the rope directly around the tree (which is terrible for your rope’s longevity), and then rappel down, climbing up again and again until I got too tired to keep doing it.

Mom and Dad eventually found out. If I wanted to hit bigger heights, I had to let them in on it. From trees I moved on to an old nearby antenna tower that wasn’t used anymore. I’d go through life eyeballing places that were easy to climb up and had a big, clear drop. I eventually rappelled down things like an elevator shaft in a building under construction, out of the ceiling of a gymnasium, my dorm room window at college, a few times over the stage of an auditorium during a performance, and a few nice, big cliffs. One time I even rappelled down a cliff IN a kayak. (That’s a whole separate post! Stay tuned…)

It was awesome. Sometimes it felt like something out of a SWAT Team movie, other times it felt like some kind of military special forces thing, but mostly it was just…fun! I loved going off big cliffs, giving a big kick off the wall, and hearing the rope making that “zzzzzzz” noise as it rushed through the hardware, lowering me safely to the ground as fast as I allowed it to. Other times it was a challenge to have precise control over the descent speed. (I almost smashed through a window once in college, but I was able to control the descent enough to avoid doing that. I’m not sure how I would’ve explained THAT one!)

It’s been forever since I did any rappelling. I still have all the gear in the basement, though. I made ziplines, pulley systems, all kinds of crazy stuff. Now my kids are starting to get interested in it. Anyway, I’ve got two ways to tie this story in to your journey of living a more impactful life for Christ.

The first has to do with fear. The absolute scariest part of a rappel is right at the beginning, the part where you make the transition from standing on your own two feet to placing your full weight and trust in the strength of the rope and harness. Especially if you’re new to rappelling, it’s very scary to stand with your heels hanging off the edge of a cliff and then lean backward. The more you do it though, the easier it becomes. You start out from small heights, you learn to trust the equipment, and you pay less attention to the audacity of what you’re doing. You become more at ease with what’s happening, and you’re able to move on to something bigger, because your capability and capacity to handle bigger situations grows.

The second goes back to when I first started rappelling. I wanted to keep this hobby a secret; I had to be careful who I let in on it. I wanted to do it so badly though, that I was willing to do it in secret and worry about the consequences later. If you’re looking to be used greatly for Christ’s kingdom, and you’ve been moving toward letting Him use you for that purpose, there will come a point at which you simply stop worrying, and decide that you’ll deal with the consequences as you go. When it comes to living for Christ, dream a dream so big that you have to be careful who you allow yourself to tell about it. Not only can He make it happen, but someday down the line, you can look back over your shoulder and see how much farther past your original goal He’s taken you.

What do I mean when I talk about a goal or being used greatly for God’s glory? You may not even have a clear picture, or a fully formed idea…you just know that there’s something you keep coming back to over and over. Watch this video; it’s less than 3 minutes, and it does a better job explaining that phenomenon than I can.

I Have To – Promotional Trailer from Christy Fay on Vimeo.

This week is Thanksgiving. You may be getting ready to see someone you don’t see often. For your version of a “beginner’s cliff” to rappel from, here’s my challenge to you: that little thing God’s been whispering in your ear…your “I have to”…tell someone about it. Whether you want to blurt it out for all to hear when you’re sitting around the table, or tell just one person when you’re alone with them and you have the opportunity, say it out loud to someone when you’re together this week. Use this video as a discussion starter if you think it will help. That’s what I did when I got the idea for this blog, which is the start of my “I have to.” I figured that if I told someone, and they didn’t hear about any progress on it, they might ask me about it later. Telling someone was my way of moving the idea outside my head, almost a way of holding myself accountable and setting things in motion.

A little fear is good. It helps keep you alert, focused, and it helps you learn what’s important and what’s not. Too much of it will hold you back and keep your feet from leaving the ground. Everyone gets scared sometimes, but it’s how to deal with it that makes the difference. Don’t let fear prevent you from taking the leap that God’s been whispering in your ear.

God’s invited you on an adventure. I don’t know how big your particular cliff is. He can bring you to the edge, but it’s up to you to hang your heels off the edge and lean out into the void. Trust the rope. Trust your gear. The first few steps are the scariest, but believe me, if God’s prodding you in a certain direction, it’s an invitation to be a part of something special. Take the first step this week by moving that idea outside of your head.