You Don’t Wear the Black Armband Forever

A view of Earth rising above the lunar surface during Apollo 8

When I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut. I loved learning about the space race of the 1960s and 70s, and at one point I knew the name and assigned crew position of every Apollo astronaut that flew on a mission during the Apollo Program.

In 1961 the Americans had barely touched space. America’s first man in space, Alan Shepard, didn’t even complete an orbit; the weak rocket he used only got him high enough to kiss the edge of space. The Soviets had already sent their first Cosmonaut into orbit, and this launch was a weak American response, barely doing enough to keep us in the race. Less than three weeks later, American President Kennedy threw down the audacious goal of beating the Soviets in a manned mission to the moon before the end of the decade, as a way of establishing American preeminence in space.

Thus began a harrowing eight or nine years for NASA. It had to not only figure out the best strategy for meeting the goal, but it also had to develop skills and equipment that didn’t exist.

The process moved fast and grew increasingly complex with time. First NASA sent up one astronaut at a time, and the longest that any mission stayed up was just over a day. Then it started launching two astronauts at a time. They started to do spacewalks, to rendezvous with other orbiting objects, and to see if a capsule and crew could physically last for the two weeks in space that it would take to make it to the moon and back. Finally, it was time for the Apollo missions, which carried three men and the ability to use a lunar lander that would be used to land on the moon.

By all measures, Apollo was a beast of a program. The spacecraft systems’ subsystems had subsystems. Engineers working on the spacecraft worked in round-the-clock shifts, and projects still fell behind schedule. Everyone worked at a breakneck speed to get things ready to meet the deadline. In January 1967, the first Apollo mission finally drew near. Three astronauts sat atop their huge rocket and conducted a final test to demonstrate that all systems were ready to operate on their own.

Then an unmitigated disaster struck, freezing everything in its tracks. As the rocket still sat on the launch pad, a ferocious fire erupted inside the cabin, and killed the three astronauts before they could escape from the capsule. The fire killed America’s second man in space, its first spacewalker, and a rookie astronaut. The devastating setback stunned the nation. All work stopped while NASA, the spacecraft contractors, and even Congress sought answers to what went wrong and whether the moon was worth the cost.

Fellow astronauts escort Grissom’s body to Arlington Cemetery

It wouldn’t be until October 1968, more than a year and a half, before another manned American launch occurred…an eternity when considering JFK’s looming end-of-the-decade deadline. With time running out, everyone needed to figure out how to grieve but still move forward. In the miniseries “From the Earth to the Moon,” Wally Schirra, the commander of the first space mission after the fire, was asked about preparing for his upcoming launch while living in the shadow of the Apollo 1 tragedy. He responded “You’re sad. You mourn the loss.” He paused for a moment before adding “But you don’t wear the black armband forever.”

Without question, there are tragedies in peoples’ lives that knock them down hard. The death of a loved one; a betrayal by someone you trust; a feared diagnosis; a job loss; a terrible injury; an addiction you’re fighting through. There are serious and legitimate times in our lives when we just can’t be an effective contributor to God’s kingdom. Nobody faults you for things that are beyond your control. It takes time to fight through many of these problems, and many times God will make something good out of them. Just make sure that you don’t start using your sorrows and difficulties as an excuse not to move forward with what God’s calling you to do.

You’re the only one that knows whether or not this is an issue you’re dealing with. You WILL be knocked down; Jesus promised that we’d have trouble in this world. Sometimes you need to stay down for a minute, but don’t forget that you do need to get back up again.

Don’t wear the black armband forever. There are people you might not even know about that are waiting for you to get back up again.